Did you remember to take your bird poison today?
That’s not a figure of speech…the feds have actually approved bird poison as a treatment for multiple sclerosis patients. The "drug" in question is called Ampyra, and it contains 4-Aminopyridine. Look it up — it’s the same toxin used to keep birds away from crops and buildings.
As a poison, it works by attacking the birds’ nervous system, giving the critters seizures and eventually causing them to drop dead out of the sky. Before the birds go belly up, they caw out a distress call, causing the whole flock to fly off.
And the feds say this poison is OK for people? Give me a break. The Humane Society wants this stuff banned from animal use, but do you think they’ve made a peep of protest about giving it to humans?
Check out the label for the bird poison — phrases like "hazards to humans and animals" and "harmful if swallowed" leap out. I guess someone at the FDA didn’t get the memo before they approved it for MS patients.
The supposed benefits of bird poison are laughable — it’s not an MS cure. It’s not even a real treatment. It may help some patients walk a little bit faster — between 10 and 30 percent faster.
That’s it.
Hold your e-mails. If you’ve been slowed by disease or illness, I know how frustrating it is to have to inch along at a snail’s pace. I know you’d give just about anything not to hear the exasperated sighs of someone unhappily forced to trudge behind you. I know you’d like to just be able to go for a walk in the park and not have to wonder if you can make it back home under your own power.
I know all that — but bird poison isn’t the way to help yourself, unless that park is overrun with crows.
Ampyra’s side effects include MS relapse — so not only will it NOT help your condition, it could make it even worse. It can also cause seizures, urinary infections, insomnia, dizziness, headaches, back pain, balance problems, constipation and sore throat.
That’s not even the complete list.
If you’re suffering from MS, I feel for you. I know you’re looking for a cure, or at least something that can help — but believe me, this isn’t it.
Pointing out what’s really for the birds,