Hayward Upgrades Spill Assessment To “Catastrophe”

Tony Hayward, head of British Oil Company BP who are heading the cleanup efforts in the Gulf of Mexico, has recently stated that the oil spill still taking place off the coast of Louisiana represents an “environmental catastrophe.”  While being lamely interrogated by some CNN personality, Hayward responded frankly that the spill was a “very significant environmental crisis.”

Additionally, President Obama’s 11 year old daughter, Malia, has expressed her own concerns over the spill.  “You know, when I woke up this morning and I’m shaving, and Malia knocks on my bathroom door and she peeks in her head and she says, ‘Did you plug the hole yet, Daddy?’”  Unfortunately, Obama did not say whether or not he responded to his daughter by saying “that’s what she said.”

Currently the strategy being used to “plug the hole” involves shooting debris like golf balls, shredded rubber tires into the into the blowout preventer, the idea being to clog it and stop, or at least slow, the leak.  This method, called the” junk shot”, is supposed to fill up the preventer, the device which failed to prevent the leak in the first place.

Related posts:

  1. BP Tries To Stop Leak As Hearings Begin
  2. UPDATE: Louisiana oil spill containment efforts, unsatisfactory
  3. Officials Criticize BP’s Response To Oil Spill