James Delingpole
London Telegraph
Wednesday, Dec 30th, 2009
One of my personal favourite Comedy Moments of 2009 came in the
unlikely context of a BBC Radio 5 Live debate on climate change. The
female presenter, as we’ve come to expect of the BBC, was quite
shamelessly biased towards the Warmist camp, but this apparently
wasn’t enough for the show’s resident weatherman. When his
turn came to read the weather, he instead chose to deliver an impromptu
homily on the seriousness of Anthropogenic Global Warming. I forget the
exact words but his speech began something like: “Well I
work for the Met Office and I’d just like to say….”
Dear, oh dear. The poor chap. I fear the time will soon come –
if it hasn’t already – when the phrase “I work for
the Met Office” will command about as much respect as “I
was in charge of the New Orleans levee defences in the run-up to
Katrina” or “I’m head of security at Lagos
International Airport.” The UK Meteorological Office
– established in 1854 – is supposed to be Britain’s
greatest authority on forecasting the weather. So how come these
days its predictions are so risibly inaccurate you’d probably be
better off consulting tea leaves or cock entrails?
We all remember (with some bitterness) the glaring contrast between
the Met Office’s rosy prediction of a “barbecue
summer” and the chilly wash-out we actually experienced. This
month, you may have noticed, they’ve screwed up yet again. A
“mild winter” was what the Met Office promised us. But a
“mild winter” (clue: notice how many fewer toes you have
than you did in June) is what we definitely haven’t got.
This has not, of course, prevented the Met Office coming up with one of
its characteristic “even though we’re wrong we’re
right” defences:
A Met Office spokesman said: “That forecast was
dealing with the whole of the winter. December has certainly been cold
but the prediction is for December, January and February.”He believed the “climate team” was updating the prediction “perhaps over the course of the next week.”
The spokesman added: “It has certainly been a cold winter so
far in most parts but the seasonal forecast has not been proven one way
or the other.”He said the weather was expected to remain cold for “the next
week or so” but he could not comment on the longer term.
Interesting that “could not comment on the longer term”
bit. Normally, this is the Met Office’s prime speciality. It may
not be able to tell us with any reliability what the weather is going
to be like next weekend. But ask it to predict what global climate is
going to be up to in 50 or a 100 years time and its prescience is truly
uncanny. It’s going to be warmer, apparently. Much, much warmer.
With drastically risen sea levels. Melted glaciers and ice caps.
Ravening packs of emaciated polar bears cruising the world on
diminishing ice floes. etc.
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