Author: Serkadis

  • Jesse James, Sandra Bullock’s Husband, Searching For Missing Dog

    Jesse James, the daredevil husband of Hollywood Golden Girl Sandra Bullock, is pleading for the public’s help in finding his missing dog, CinnaBun, after the canine mysteriously disappeared from his bike shop in Long Beach this week.


    The carmel-colored pitbull has been missing from Jesse’s custom bike shop, West Coast Choppers, since Monday afternoon, and the reality star is appealing to the online community to help bring CinnaBun home. In an urgent message Tweeted to the Interwebs on Tuesday, Jesse asks that anyone with information about the dog’s whereabouts please call immediately.

    “CinnaBun our shop dog & pet been missing since 2pm yesterday. If you find her plz (please) call 562-983-6666.”


  • Survival Of The Fittest: DST’s Yuri Milner Talks To Us At The World Economic Forum

    Yuri Milner, the CEO of Russian investment and operating company Digital Sky Technologies, had quite a 2009. I had a chance to sit down with Milner today at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland for a short video interview.

    The company now holds substantial equity in two of the hottest pre-IPO startups, Facebook and Zynga. And their innovative way of structuring deals, where they buy both preferred stock from the company and common stock from employees, is becoming the hot new way to invest in startups. In fact, people are now referring to “DST-style deals,” even where DST isn’t one of the investors. See Yelp, for example:

    The size of the rounds is in the $50 million range, but includes both a primary investment component as well as a secondary offering for long time employees. These deals are now being referred to as “DST deals,” since DST first invested in Facebook in May 2009 at a $10 billion valuation and later funded employee buyouts at a $6.5 billion valuation. They did a similar deal with Zynga.

    I first met Milner the day he announced his investment in Facebook, where he and Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg explained the details and rationale for their investment in an exclusive TechCrunch video interview.

    The price he paid for his Facebook stock – a $10 billion valuation – was scoffed at in May. Today, it’s clear he got a great deal as Facebook common stock is trading at $14 billion and above. The Facebook common stock purchased by DST last summer cost Milner just a $6.5 billion valuation.

    It was just a few months later that Milner was in the news again, beating out the competition to become the lead investor in a huge venture round for Zynga.

    We’ve had our fun with Milner and DST, watching as the Russian firm stepped in and paid higher prices for hot startups than local VCs would even consider.

    But the reality is that DST’s investment decisions look pretty damned smart with the benefit of hindsight. And the entity isn’t really “Russian” anymore – Milner is making almost all of his investments outside of Russia, and most of the new investors he’s bringing in to fund all this activity are non-Russian.

    More and more, Milner is just looking like a really smart and really aggressive investor.


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  • DocuSign gets a new CEO as it aims to dominate electronic signatures

    Steve King_DocuSign CEO and presidentElectronic signature company DocuSign has a new chief executive — Steve King, who previously served as an executive at E-Trade and also led a number of online software startups.

    Seattle-based DocuSign said it now holds 73 percent of the “eSign” market — namely, allowing businesses to replace hand-written signatures with electronic ones, so deals can be made and contracts can be sent online. The company has more than 20,000 customers, including American Airlines, Comcast, LinkedIn, and the National Association of Realtors, and says it has delivered more than 54 million signatures. (Competitor EchoSign says it has more than 14,000 customers.) King compared DocuSign with Zantaz, an email archiving company where he was CEO for seven years, and which was eventually acquired by enterprise search company Autonomy.

    “There are a lot of parallels between Zantaz [now] and DocuSign [when I joined],” King said. “They were both the market leader, and they were both on the verge of a market that was about to become much larger.”

    King said his goal is to “build on our market leadership position.” Vice President of Marketing Doug Wheeler added that the next step in electronic signatures involves “more than just the signature itself” — it’s not just who can deliver e-signatures, but also who can integrate that process with other applications.

    In addition to naming a new CEO, DocuSign is also adding Keith Krach, founder and former CEO of now-public business software company Ariba, to its board of directors. Meanwhile, previous CEO Matthew Schiltz will lead the company’s strategic business development.

    DocuSign has raised a total of $38.9 million in funding. Investors include Frazier Technology Ventures, Ignition Partners, Second Century Ventures, Sigma Partners and WestRiver Capital.


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  • Hydrophobia rain cover promises to keep your DSLR dry, mysterious

    Alright, so a new rain cover for a DSLR isn’t the most exciting of developments, but the folks at Think Tank Photo have managed to put a bit of a new spin on the idea with their new Hydrophobia 70-200 and Hydrophobia 70-200 Flash covers (both based on the company’s pro-level 300-600 cover). Those, as you’ve probably discerned, will accommodate a DSLR with up to a 70-200 lens (and, in the latter case, a flash), and protect it during even the toughest downpours. What’s more, you can actually attach your DSLR and simply carry it by the rain cover, and the two sleeves are big enough to not only let you control the camera (with the help of a clear window ’round back), but swap out batteries or memory cards as well. Of course, this one doesn’t come cheap, with the basic model running $139, and the flash-accommodating model setting you back $145.

    Hydrophobia rain cover promises to keep your DSLR dry, mysterious originally appeared on Engadget on Wed, 27 Jan 2010 08:40:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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  • CGI: Peugeot 209

    We do know that Peugeot 209 is an enigma for all of us, but what we have here are actually two computer-generated images (CGI) showing this future model of the French manufacturer. Unfortunately, there are no technical or any other sort of details available but we can easily notice the similarities between this model and the SR1 concept to be displayed by Peugeot at the 2010 Geneva Motor Show in March.

    The SR1 represents Peugeot’s new path in the automotive sector, but only in terms of design… (read more)

  • Calista Flockhart Leaving “Brothers & Sisters?”

    Calista Flockhart has cut her role on the ABC family drama Brothers & Sisters, Entertainment Weekly scooped on Tuesday.

    The petite star – who plays Kitty McCallister on the series – will be working a reduced schedule next season.

    Last week, Calista’s co-star Rob Lowe was released from his contract role as Senator Robert McCallister. He will leave Brothers & Sisters at the end of the current fourth season. EW sources suggest that Rob made the decision to depart the show after hearing that Calista would be cutting her screen time, fearing that his role on the show would become even smaller.

    Brothers & Sisters airs Sundays @ 10 PM on ABC.


  • Civic Education Project Spring and Summer Jobs

    Spend a week (or a month or more) this spring or summer helping young people discover how to make a difference in the world! The Civic Education Project (CEP), a leadership and citizenship program at Northwestern University, is NOW HIRING exceptional staff for our Spring & Summer 2010 service-learning programs.

    Spring & Summer Programs:
    CEP offers week-long immersion programs for 9th-12th graders during the academic year, and intensive, three-week service-learning courses for 7th-12th graders during the summer. CEP programs explore complex social issues through academic study, meaningful service work, and meetings with community leaders, and help teach young people how to apply their skills and abilities to pressing social issues in their own communities. This year, CEP will offer programs in Chicago, Baltimore, New York, San Francisco, and Washington, DC, covering a wide variety of topics, including poverty, homelessness, education, public health, law, politics, leadership, and social change.

    Job Opportunities:
    We are looking for outstanding teachers and administrators from public and private schools and universities, service-learning practitioners, other education, nonprofit and youth development professionals, and graduate and undergraduate students. Instructional, residential, and administrative positions are available, ranging from one-week to seven-week sessions in the spring or summer. Staff generally receive a cash stipend, room and board, and training in service-learning and experiential education. However, the biggest payoff comes from the opportunity to work with bright, motivated students, build community with passionate, dynamic colleagues, and gain valuable experience educating young people about civic engagement and social responsibility.

    How to Apply:
    To learn more about CEP programs and staff positions or to apply online, visit our website at:
    http://www.civiceducationproject.com/jobs

    Spring staff consideration begins NOW, and summer staff consideration begins February 15, 2010. Applications are accepted at any time, but are reviewed on a rolling basis as they are received, so candidates are encouraged to apply early to ensure full consideration.

    You can be part of creating “eye-opening,” “mind-blowing,” “life-changing” experiences for young student leaders.

    Apply Now!
    http://www.civiceducationproject.com/jobs

  • Cyberdyne Systems Toyota reportedly working on robots to look after the elderly

    Filed under: , ,

    We have an announcement to make: the Robot Apocalypse is not on its way. The Robot Apocalypse has officially begun. Toyota is working on a plethora of robots that will assist in caring for the elderly. Home health care is massively expensive and time consuming, and if the task were pawned off on taken over by robots, the “savings,” as they’re being called, would be huge.

    Two of the robots in development can do things like play instruments and fetch things. One of the robots is a machine straight out of Aliens: a seat mounted on robotic legs and controlled by a joystick. It would allow the aged to go anywhere that robots can go… which is, really, anywhere. And once Toyota adds arms and battle axes, plus that dung-beetle-derived full-color night vision system, any elderly person able to move a joystick will immediately be the most powerful human alive. So we really might want to think about this…

    The robots also have manufacturing uses, aided by Toyota’s research into a wire-operation system to replace hydraulics and “adding limberness and speed to the motion.” Toyota plans to have them working on the moon by 2020. Yes, the moon (from where they will launch their first attack in 2021). First the elderly. Then babies. Then… you. Human.

    [Source Toyota via TG Daily]

    Cyberdyne Systems Toyota reportedly working on robots to look after the elderly originally appeared on Autoblog on Wed, 27 Jan 2010 08:29:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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  • Jeep Gets Three 4×4 Awards in the UK

    Jeep has reasons to celebrate, as the American car manufacturer managed to top three of the six awards categories presented by UK’s 4×4 Magazine: Extreme, SUV and Budget 4×4 of the Year. The awards are even more important as the criteria was simple: that vehicles should be powered by a diesel engine and offer some form of sophisticated off-road ability.

    The Jeep Wrangler was named Extreme 4×4 of the Year. The judges said: The Jeep Wrangler came out the winner in a straight fight against Land … (read more)

  • Artega Sold, Now Related to Corona

    A few years ago a new slim sports car was introduced to the world. We are talking about the mid-engined Artega GT, which looked pretty promising.

    The car had the right ingredients to become a perfect automotive cocktail. It was powered by Volkswagen-sourced 3.6 liter V6 unit, matted to the German manufacturer’s innovative six-speed double clutch DSG gearbox. The engine was mounted on an aluminum space frame and the whole light package was wrapped in a carbon composite body designed by Henrik … (read more)

  • Bayonetta PS3 patch to allow game install

    Due to insistent consumer demand, Sega has given in and will soon release a patch that will allow players to install Bayonetta into the PS3’s HDD.
     
     
     
     

  • HTC HD2 ROM 1.66 for many languages now available for “fast and reliable SMS messaging”

    HTC has now finally released its 1.66 ROM for the HTC HD2, meant to address its annoying SMSM bug which currently means  carry another phone just for this purpose, in more languages.

    The software is now available in Norway, Spain, Denmark, France, Sweden, Italy, and again in WW English.

    This software is suitable for the following devices : HTC HD2

    ROM Upgrade for HTC HD2

    Release Date: 2010-01-25

    An updated ROM is now available for HTC HD2 users to download. As always, HTC is committed to providing customers with the best possible mobile experience.
    Installation Instructions:

    ROM Version:

    Norway:1.66.409.1,Spain :1.66.412.1,Denmark:1.66.403.1,France :1.66.406.1,Sweden:1.66.413.2,Italy:1.66.408.1,WWE:1.66.405.2

    Improved Functions:
    Keeping in touch has always been very important, and this update delivers fast and reliable SMS messaging.

    Download the ROM update, which will wipe your device, from HTC here.

    Via Coolsmartphone.com

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  • Caterpillar Slides After Missing On Revenue And Giving A Mediocre Weak Outlook (CAT)

    caterpillar tbi

    Shares of Caterpillar (CAT) are down about 2% pre-market:

    From Briefing.com:

    7:38AM Caterpillar beats by $0.13, misses on revs; guides FY10 EPS below consensus, revs in-line (CAT) 55.85 : Reports Q4 (Dec) earnings of $0.41 per share, excluding non-recurring items, $0.13 better than the First Call consensus of $0.28; revenues fell 38.9% year/year to $7.9 bln vs the $8.11 bln consensus. Co issues mixed guidance for FY10, sees EPS to be ‘about 2.50 at the midpoint of sales and revenue range’ vs. $2.71 consensus; sees FY10 revs up 10-25% y/y (~35.6- 40.4 bln) vs. $36.06 bln consensus. Sales volume is expected to be the most significant positive profit driver in 2010. Material costs are expected to be favorable in 2010.

    Remember, Caterpillar is one of Obama’s favorite companies. We wonder what they think about the spending freeze.

    Join the conversation about this story »

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  • Force India Confirm VJM03 Launch on February 10

    After Red Bull Racing, Force India Mercedes has also announced their official car launch date for the 2010 season. According to a spokesman from the Silverstone-based team, the VJM03 will meet the public eye for the first time on February 10, the same day the second test of the off-season kicks off in Jerez.

    The VJM03 has always been scheduled for a test debut on 10 February. This has been a long-standing plan and there is no deviation from this, said the spokesman.

    In recent days, some re… (read more)

  • Prevention – Hospital Discharge and Prevention Service, Brent

    Prevention-case-study-1

    In October 2004 Willow Housing and Care, a sheltered housing provider, set up a support service in Brent to help older people return to independent living more quickly following a stay in hospital. Now in its sixth year, the service is producing real success stories.

    Supporting older people leaving hospital

    An older person may face a number of challenges when they return home after a stay in hospital.

    “It might be that their home is no longer suitable because they physically can’t manage unless aids and adaptations are fitted,” says Mary Whitfield, Willow’s Director of Supported Housing. “Utility bills may not have been paid while the older person is in hospital and contact needs to be made with the utility companies. Or advice is needed on future housing options for the older person. Their accommodation may need cleaning or the bedroom moved downstairs so they can they stay independent”.

    In 2004, Willow Housing and Care, a specialist provider of housing and support services for older people, identified a lack of support and guidance for older people readjusting to their lives after a stay in hospital. This increased the likelihood of hospital re-admittance or an unnecessary move into residential care after an older people remains in hospital longer than necessary and becomes dependent.

    Willow approached Brent Council’s Supporting People commissioning team and offered to set up a new service to support older people leaving hospital, and help them return to independent living – the Hospital Discharge and Prevention Service.

    Initially Brent Council agreed to fund one support worker to deliver the service as a pilot. They have reviewed the funding annually, and there are now two full-time workers and one part-time worker, as well as an additional part-time support worker in Harrow. Each has a caseload of 25 people.

    Bespoke support for the individual

    Willow’s approach is to hold discussions with the older person, their relatives and health and social care staff. This way, the support worker can find out the person’s requirements and aspirations and develop a support plan tailored to their specific needs.

    As people are referred to the service while they are still in hospital, this approach means that support workers can make sure that everything is in place when the person is ready to go home.

    Housing support is usually a key feature of any such plan. Support workers will do joint assessments of the person’s home and ensure any recommended adaptations take place, such as installing a fall detection system, fitting grab rails or a community alarm.

    “We would look at grants for insulation to keep them warm or aids and adaptations to help them stay in their home and remain independent,” Mary says.

    If the person is living in poor quality housing or being threatened with eviction, then it may be necessary to assist them in moving to an alternative home of their choice, the service enables older people to make informed decisions about their housing. 

    “If they are saying they want to stay in their home, then we do our best to help them stay in the property they are in. If that’s not possible or they don’t want to, we will help them look for something more suitable,” Mary says.

    The support plan also takes into account an individual’s wider housing related needs. For example, if someone has fallen behind with their bills, support workers give advice on maximising income and managing budgets.

    Staff take a multi-agency approach in providing full support to client that enable them to live independently for as long as possible.

    More than a ‘signposting’ service

    As well as offering one to one housing related support, the service acts as a point of contact to help people access a wider range of support services.  Whatever the needs of the person, support workers are there to support them as much as they want.

    Workers can make referrals to the social care service if somebody needs care at home, or to the pension service if somebody’s benefits and allowances need to be reviewed. They can help older people access GPs or refer them to specialist charities such as Age Concern or Macmillan Cancer Support. They can also send reminders to attend GP appointments or assist in filling in benefit applications.

    If a person is feeling socially isolated, workers can provide information on local events and activities to help them make links within the community.

    “Some people may feel isolated because they haven’t made links in their local community and we can help them to make those links. If there are any community groups they want to go to we will arrange for this happen and if need be go with them on their first visit. . If language is an issue, we can use interpreters” Mary says.

    Local services working together

    Mary stresses the service is built on partnership working.

    “It wouldn’t work without support from [Brent] Adult Social Services and the hospital teams.”

    Because everyone sees the benefits of the service, there are now regular hospital discharge meetings between Willow, Brent Social Services and the local hospital to discuss patients.

    “The fact that the hospital invites a housing professional to attend [the hospital discharge meeting], that’s a move forward. It used to be hard to get health and housing professionals to meet together” says Mary.

    “The real contact is staff on the ground who are doing the job. They have really good working relationships and that’s why it works.”

    Willow support workers are also co-located with social services staff, which helps build relationships. Hospital staff are able to call Willow workers directly to refer new patients who they think may need some support.

    “Because they work so closely together, the hospital might ring up one of the workers or social services and say they have someone who has come in and needs support now so they can start the process immediately,” says Mary.

    Success stories

    Support workers generally work with a person for approximately six months, although it will depend on the needs of the person.

    At the end of the service, people are asked for their views. Comments are generally very positive.

    “The support worker was very helpful and friendly. She helped me to apply for housing as I was in a hostel. I now feel independent, confident and in control of my life. Also, I have had equipment fitted which will prevent me from falling” said an older person who recently left the scheme.

    There is evidence that the service has enabled people to remain independent for longer. Analysis carried out by the Department of Health’s Care Services Efficiency Delivery Programmes showed that, in a sample of 20 people who used the service, 65% were able to return to independent living rather than move to a more intensive setting such as a care home. The service was short-listed for the Guardian Public Service Awards 2009.

  • Jennifer Lopez “How I Met Your Mother” Guest Appearance

    Jennifer Lopez will guest star on an upcoming episode of the CBS comedy How I Met Your Mother, USA TODAY said Wednesday.

    The “Louboutins” singer/ will play Anita Appleby, “a no-nonsense self-help guru teaching women how to ‘train’ men in relationships through the power of denial,” according to a description of the episode, scheduled to air in March.

    In related news, HIMYM — which aired its 100th episode this month — has been renewed for a sixth season.


  • Personalisation – Elaine and Michael Yates, Northamptonshire

    Case-study-pic1-IMG_4215

    Northamptonshire couple Michael and Elaine Yates’ lives were changed when Michael had a stroke. Adjusting to their new circumstances remains a challenge, but using a personal budget to pay for Michael’s care has been a positive experience.

    Until 2004, Michael Yates was a warehouse worker living with his wife Elaine, their dog William and their two cats in the Northamptonshire town of Rushden.

    That April their lives changed when Michael had a stroke at the age of 58, leaving him with a brain injury which has affected his short-term memory and his mobility. He also has epileptic fits.

    “Michael’s brain only tells him what he can see; there are no grey areas,” Elaine says. “He can’t cross the road on his own because he can’t judge the traffic and it took me months to teach him how to make a cup of tea because there are so many steps to it”.

    For a few years after his stroke, Elaine carried on working to pay their mortgage while Michael attended a daycentre. But Michael wasn’t happy at the centre, and Elaine found it stressful holding down a demanding job in a shoe factory and then caring for Michael in the evenings.

    In 2006, Elaine decided to give up her job to care for Michael full-time.  She now helps him in every aspect of his life. They see this as a turning point in both their lives.

    Michael started attending a new workshop twice a week. Called ‘TOOLS for self-reliance’, the Northampton-based scheme sees volunteers clean old tools, which are then sent out to developing countries. Michael really enjoys TOOLS, and through it, he and Elaine met other people living with brain injuries. They realised they weren’t alone.

    Michael initially received direct payments for his care. He in effect became Elaine’s employer. She would send a timesheet of the hours she had worked to an agency working for the County Council. They would then send her a pay slip, just as when she was working in the factory.

    In July 2008 they received a letter from Northamptonshire County Council telling them about a pilot scheme for personal budgets. At first, Elaine was cautious.

    “I was frightened, no one likes changes”, she says.

    But the direct payments system did have certain restrictions that Elaine found difficult to manage. For example, Elaine couldn’t pay an unregistered person to look after Michael if she needed to pop out.

    “If the doctor came and left a prescription,” she says. “I couldn’t use the money to pay someone to sit with Michael while I went to fetch the prescription”.

    Elaine and Michael decided to discuss the personal budget option with their care manager at the County Council. He explained more about how personal budgets work, and re-assured them that they would have help in making decisions about Michael’s care. They decided to give the personal budget system a try.

    Elaine says the system suits them because it is more flexible than direct payments and allows greater control of their own budget. It also enables them to identify and list exactly what Michael’s needs are and how they can be met.

    “There was so much that wasn’t written into a direct payment, it was just to pay for his care,” Elaine says. “Whereas the personal budget is about him, it’s about his life, what he wants to achieve in his life and what he needs to achieve that life”.

    The personal budget does more than ensure that Michael can access the care services he needs. Having control of the money means he and Elaine can include treats which Michael would like, such as visiting wildlife parks or organising a trip on a steam train, and they work with their support planner to include activities such as these in Michael’s personal budget. They can also plan for more fundamental wishes, such as Michael’s desire to die at home.

    Elaine is now a citizen leader for Northamptonshire council, talking to others about changing over to a personal budget. When she meets other service users, carers or personal assistants, she finds people are often worried about moving to a personal budget. They fear that they will have money taken away, or that someone will start telling them how to spend their money.

    She advises them not to be frightened by personal budgets, and suggests that they look into it as it could improve their situation and everyday life.

  • Next Mitsubishi Lancer Evo to drop turbo for plug-in hybrid system, electric-motor

    Say goodbye to the sweet whining of the turbocharger in the Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution. According to sources, the next-generation Lancer Evo XI will be a plug-in hybrid sedan that uses an electric-motor instead of a turbocharger that it uses right now.

    The system will use the same platform as the Concept PX-MiEV plug-in hybrid concept from last year’s Tokyo Motor Show – meaning, that the Evo XI’s 2.0L gasoline engine will be naturally aspirated and will get a boost from an electric-motor that runs on lithium-ion batteries. The electric-motor will power the front wheels, while the engine will power the rear wheels.

    Sources say that the car will give drivers the option of driving in electric-only mode for short journeys, helping them improve fuel-efficiency and reduce CO2 emissions (because that’s what every Mitsubishi Lancer Evo driver is worried about).

    Insiders say that the Evo XI will also get E-AYC, which regulates torque distribution between the rear wheels.

    – By: Omar Rana

    Source: AutoCar


  • A Screenplay with a Sweet Subtext, in One Act

    Mr. and Mrs. Scatter, together again

    The Pantsless Brother (TPB), who was so concerned about Mrs. Scatter overexposing his predicament about getting gas out of his pants, recently said, “So you haven’t written for a coupla weeks.”

    Charles Deemer commented on Mr. Scatter’s recent post about – in no particular order – hairy beasts, barista whelps, a little town some miles south of Portland known to locals as “San Francisco,” and Harrison Ford’s tendency to shout in irritation.

    What did Mr. Deemer say? To quote: “I don’t know of a blog with a sweeter subtext. I want to write the screenplay.”

    That led Mr. and Mrs. Scatter to ruminate about what subtext he could be talking about. Meeting hairy beasts in the woods? Meeting barista whelps? A glitzed-out hotel in San Fran? Yelling dialogue?

    Ah, sweet mystery of wife!Mrs. Scatter preferred to take the more romantic view and suggest the sweet subtext just might be relying on blog comments to send a message to her far-flung long-lost husband to pick up milk on the way home.

    It’s true. Mr. and Mrs. Scatter have been toiling lately in diverse locales and occasionally blowing kisses to each other through the windows of passing motorcars. By coincidence, just yesterday, Mr. and Mrs. Scatter were going in separate directions to hobnob with blog buddies – Mrs. Scatter to have coffee with MTC and Mr. Scatter to have lunch with MUW.

    As Mrs. Scatter stood in the shower with warm water cascading over her back and the soft hum of the fan filling the air, she thought about how much she appreciated the few precious minutes she had with her beloved husband before hightailing it out of the house.

    She began to wonder what a screenplay with a sweet subtext would look like. She began to wonder if it was possible, without giving too much away, to share a rare behind-the-scenes peek of Mr. and Mrs. Scatter, of the delicate nuances of their romantic tryst, of the all-important underpinnings of their strong marriage.

    Mrs. Scatter tried not to think of the baskets full of clean laundry sitting in the middle of the living room and tried not to wonder whether Mr. Scatter would have time to fold it or whether she would have to strong-arm the Large Smelly Boys. Instead, she tried to imagine a sweet, sweet subtext.

    And then, as if on cue, as if the screenplay were writing itself, this absolutely true, completely unaltered exchange happened. Mr. Deemer, we are so here to help you.

    (This dialogue has not been edited for brevity or clarity. This is reality blogging, people. Normally, the dialogue would be upper- and lowercase, but that’s just not the case here.)

    A Screenplay with a Sweet Subtext, in One Act

    0. INT. ART SCATTER WORLD HEADQUARTERS. BATHROOM. MORNING.
    Silence, except for the gentle sound of streaming water and the soft hum of a fan. Steam envelops the elegant bathroom with clean, monochromatic colors and antique tile floor. A skylight frames a cheerful view of blue sky and bare tree branches swaying ever so slightly in the breeze. A bluebird flits from branch to branch.

    MR. SCATTER

    Heard from a long way off behind a closed door. (Incoherent blah blah blah.)

    Startled, MRS. SCATTER rinses shampoo from her face.

    MRS. SCATTER

    WHAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU! THE FAN’S ON! COME CLOSER AND YELL LOUDER!!!!

    MR. SCATTER

    Heard through the door, closer this time. SOMEONE SCREWED UP THE KITCHEN LIGHTS AGAIN!

    MRS. SCATTER

    WHAT? Confused for a moment. OH! YOU MEAN THE LIGHT SWITCHES AREN’T THE RIGHT UP AND DOWN?

    MR. SCATTER

    YAH! THEY’RE ALL SCREWED UP! SOMEONE DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO LEAVE THE CORRECT ONE UP AND THE CORRECT ONE DOWN!

    MRS. SCATTER

    Reaching for the conditioner. GO AWAY! THAT DOESN’T MATTER!

    Clomping footsteps heard retreating from the bathroom door.

    MR. SCATTER

    (Harumphing grumbles.)

    MRS. SCATTER

    BUT THE TOILET PAPER BETTER GO OVER!

    MR. SCATTER

    Heard from afar, like a faint echo, from a bit down the hall. WELL, OF COURSE! WE’RE MARRIED! WE GOTTA AGREE ON THAT!

    ****

    – Laura Grimes

  • K2 Energy Solutions Released New Battery Technology

    If you’re one of those guys who thinks the electric vehicle could not become as usable as an internal combustion engined car, you might be wrong, as technical breakthroughs happen every day. Just these days, K2 Energy Solutions, a manufacturer and seller of rechargeable battery systems, has announced two new battery systems which are supposed to change the way we think about energy.

    From the beginning, our intent was to create an entirely new source of energy that could be used for a variety … (read more)