Author: JDN21

  • What animals have you slaughtered?

    State your victim, when, why and how you despatched it.

    —-

    For example, one of my recent slayings was a Squirrel back in the Autumn.
    I was powering down a country lane on my racing back while I was in training. I saw this squirrel run out in front of me, so I swerved to avoid it. But then into my path ran another Squirrel.

    I felt it crunch under my front tyre – it was very immediate as I could feel its bones crunch all the way up to my handle bars, I saw that I went over its back. Horrible.

    —-

    My most recent was in December I think. I was driving in my car early in the morning when a bird flew out in front of me. It completely vanished as it went under my bonnet. I thought I had missed it as birds seem to escape car collisions all the time. But no. I looked in my rear view mirror and saw it reeling to the deck, feathers everywhere.

  • Shovel fracas ignites war of words between Council and Army

    A Council in Surrey and the Territorial Army are engulfed in a stand-off after a fracas over a council workers shovel threatened to ignite into a full scale row.

    Council worker Colin Spooner was disgusted when a Corporal at the TA base commandeered his shovel and ‘threw it over the hedge’ after being described as an ‘irritating jobsworth’. Spooner had been visiting a road-digging site near the counties largest TA base to overlook progress. ‘I was going about my business, making sure the hole was being dug according to efficiency guidelines when the soldier approached me in an offensive manner’.

    ‘He then wrestled the spade from my grasp, verbally insulted me and then proceeded to throw the valuable council property (the spade) over the hedge of a nearby house.’ ‘I am outraged at this unprovoked behaviour and have been assured that the full weight of the Borough Council is behind me.’

    According to one eye-witness, it was Spooner, and not the TA Corporal who caused the row. Local dinner lady Doreen Shippley was waiting for a Bus just yards from the worksite and describes events very differently.

    ‘I was waiting for the Bus when my attention was drawn to this man (Spooner), dressed in shirt, tie and trousers who proceeded to jump into the whole in the road. He was acting in what I would describe as a petulant manner, barking out orders and actually digging the hole himself after saying ‘you lot haven’t got a bloody clue, you want to do it like this!’

    ‘At the same time, a marching drill was taking place on the grounds of the Army base. Mr. Spooners shouting and whistling was obviously distracting the troops on the base as they struggled to hear the Corporal give orders.’

    ‘The man from the base then came over and after a brief exchange, took a shovel from Mr. Spooners hand and threw it the floor before telling him to ‘clear off’.’

    A council spokesperson gave Spooner their full backing and described the Corporals behaviour as unacceptable.

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politi…l_spade_fracas

  • ‘Brutal’ Myleene Klass ‘threatens’ youngsters in knife ‘incident’


    It is not known whether Ms Klass was wearing this ensemble during her frenzied knife-weilding episode.

    BOOBY MYLEENE KLASS has refused to apologise after threatening youngsters with a lethal weapon. The former Hearsay star was cautioned by Police after threatening bypassers with a lethal knife she had stored in her draws at her home.

    Full story;
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/8451369.stm

    What do you make of this?

  • The Official Cock-teasers Thread

    Reading the coloured bras thread an de official brainteasers thread got me thinking. I thought ‘ello?!’

    So here we go, the ‘Official Cock-teasers thread’. Bought to you for the enjoyment of lovely fillies. Contribute and enjoy. Oh yeah! Ne’ha n’ha n’ha (as Sid James would say).

    First up, from ‘Coloured Bras’, this sort has a superb rack: