Author: Stephanie Quilao

 

I had one of those days where money was tight and I just had to make up something with whatever was in the fridge. Luckily, I had some frozen shrimp left over from the Garlic Shrimp and Lemony Kale with Shallots on Top of Quinoa recipe, a slice of bacon, and a head of garlic.

Not only was this dish tasty, it’s got to be one of the easiest things to make. Took me maybe 5-10 minutes tops.

Ingredients (serves two):

• 12 medium size frozen shrimp, thawed
• 1 slice of black forest bacon cut into bite size pieces (or whatever bacon you have on hand)
• 3 cloves of garlic minced
• Olive oil

 

Let’s Get Cooking:

• Heat a skillet to medium heat, and cook the bacon bites until they start looking cooked and you see some of the bacon oil start to appear in the pan. You don’t want the bacon crispy yet because they will be in the pan longer so there will be plenty of time to get crisp if you like.

• Pour in just a little olive oil like two tsps. The oil will help cook the garlic and shrimp. Toss in the garlic and saute with the bacon until the garlic is soft. Your kitchen will start to smell heavenly.

• Toss in the shrimp and mix together with the bacon and garlic. Cook until the shrimp are a dark pink.

Voila! You’re done. I threw my bacon garlic shrimp on top of some cooked Quinoa.

 

It’s Wednesday and time for my weekly report on what happened in my efforts to go sugar little.

You hear a great deal about the physical addictions to sugar but I also believe that you can become emotionally addicted to sugar as well. I say this because this is my experience

One of my healers long time ago told me that you can become addicted or attached to certain tastes for emotional reasons. For example, in the case of sugar, you can over consume the sweets as a way to make up for the lack of sweetness in your life like love, belongingness, or a sense of purpose. I have absolutely no arguments with that logic because I can say that is true for myself.

When sugar is love

One reason I believe that I use sugary foods as a way to make up for the sweetness I feel like I am lacking in life is in the area of love. When I’m in a relationship or very happily in love, my consumption of deserts in particular drops. My evening cravings for cookies, ice cream, or red licorice nibs diminishes because the taste of cuddles, hugs, and sex at night time are far more appetizing to me.

For example….

To me, love is sweetness. If I can’t have a man to cuddle with, I can certainly get a dark chocolate frosted cupcake to take his place. I’m not saying it’s right. I’m just saying that is what the inner Emo monster convinces us.

 

Having a highly Emo week

This week was particularly highly emotional for me, and I most definitely craved the love and acceptance of sodas, ice cream, and lemon meringue pie. On Saturday, I was all emo and listening to sappy songs like “All By Myself” about how love seems to be available for everyone except for me. But then, the universe sent me a beautiful unexpected act of nature to remind me that even in the dark of the storm, something wonderful can happen. I was really craving Ho Ho’s, red velvet bundt cake at this bakery down the street from me, and mint chip hemp ice cream.

Sprinkles has a new vegan Red Velvet cupcake which I’m dying to try but have refrained from this far. If it weren’t for all the rain this weekend, I would driven the 15 miles just to go get one of those decadent cupcakes and make it my boyfriend for the evening….I know, but hey, I’m being real here.

Getting really unexpected news

Then on Sunday, my mom called to tell me that Grandma coded in the hospital and then slipped into a coma. On Monday after lunch, my folks called me to tell me that Grandma passed away Sunday night, and that I needed to fly back home to California for her funeral. I was really sad because I loved my grandmother very much and she’s been such a big influence in my life. I wrote this post in her honor about how she taught me what really beauty is about.

I always thought I would be married before she died because family is so important to her and to me too. I wanted her to see before she left us all that I was happy in love with a family of my own or at least starting one with a husband.

This is the traditionalist in me, and so now that dream will never happen, so you can imagine how that feeling really made me want to inhale a whole jelly roll and swallow it down with hot cocoa loaded with homemade marshmallows like these absolutely stunning marshmallows  @ZahraHov made and put in her cocoa. I was practically licking the screen drooling over that cocoa.

I didn’t overload on sugar but….

On Monday night, everything was just hitting me too much so admittedly, I needed to self medicate. But instead of reaching for half a dozen chocolate chip cookies like I normally would do, I drank a bottle of Two Buck Chuck Shiraz, the best cheapest sophisticated wine in town….in my humble opinion. Seriously, $2.99 for a whole bottle of wine that doesn’t suck or comes in a box or with a screw cap is really wonderful for those of us living in starving artist mode til our big break happens.

Instead of just seeing this as getting drunk which really I was more just happily buzzed, I looked at it as toasting Grandma’s life….over and over again. She would have approved because Grandma was always the life of the party and back in the day, I’ve seen her pound down a few herself. And of course we’re in the safety of our home, no driving, and I was smart to also drink copious amounts of H20. I too walk my hydration nudge talk.

Now drinking a bottle of red wine by yourself is certainly by all means not a “better” alternative to eating a bunch of cookies even though I did consume less sugar grams. But, to celebrate a tiny victory, I did not inhale any cheesecake, rice krispy treats, or marshmallow covered cocoa which is good! 

Better choices

Next step though, is to pick something better or I should say something that is more effective in helping me reach my health goals while being comforting. Maybe a nice bowl of butternut squash soup with a warm soothing bubble bath. I need to get more creative at finding things that comfort me without involving food all the time. Because yes, for me, food = comfort….big time.

I have to get a bunch of things ready today because I fly out to California Thursday morning and I’ll be gone a week. It’s also my mom, aunt, and sis-in-laws birthdays, so with grandma passing, I now more then ever want to spend as much time as I can with loved ones especially my mommy…yeah, we’re at the mommy level of needing comfort now and my mom is really good at spoiling me with affection and attention.

So, how was your week with the sugar weaning? Those of you who gave up sugar for lent, how is that going?

My grandma Rose passed away last night on 2/21/10 at the age of 97. She was one of the role models in my life and someone I held in very high regard. I'm going to fly back to California on Thursday for her funeral.

In the second to last time I saw her before she passed, I write this post on Back in Skinny Jeans in Sept 2008 about how Grandma taught me a lesson about what real beauty is. This post was one of the most popular on BISJ, and is a loving example of what we can learn from those who are wise and full of grace.

I love you Grandma and thank you for helping to make me the woman I am today 🙂 Rest in loving peace.

————

Everyone say hello to my Grandma Rose here with my folks. I want to share with you all how this Saturday, in less than an hour, Grandma taught me what real beauty is about. Granny is the best teacher that anyone could know, and she will be 97 in October. Rose is now bed ridden in the hospital
because of a slew of health issues, but somehow her spirit does not know that
because she can still light up a room better than anyone I know. More on that
in a bit.

This weekend was pretty intense for me as in one day
literally back-to-back, I attended a funeral for one of my uncle’s who passed
away, visited my Grandma Rose at the Convalescent hospital, and saw baby pictures
of grandma’s latest great grand-children. Yes folks, I got the entire life
cycle in mere hours.

But, more about what my amazing Grandma taught me about
beauty…

Grandma Rose is one of my sheroes, and you will quickly see
why. This woman has 10 children (9 girls and 1 boy), 38 grandchildren, and to
date about 32 great-grandchildren (I say about only because I lose track as my
brain gets overwhelmed sometimes with the enormousity of my family.) Besides
being a mother to a football team, she was a pharmacist, a high school teacher,
and later on a politico in her home province in the Philippines. Yeah, she’s
beyond super woman, and you get a glimpse as to where some of my need to be
perfect girl came to play.

Everyone Loves Grandma
Rose

But even more amazing than her accomplishments is the
vibrant spirit that lives inside her. Everyone that has ever met my grandmother
loves her because she is the kind of person that everyone wants to be around
because she makes you feel special, at ease, and happy. Grandma is quite the
comedian too. She’s like laughing gas. As an example, one of my cousins recently
had this conversation with her:

…We spend more time making our box look prettier instead of filling
that box with beautiful, loving, vibrant spirit. Why? …

“Did you have many boyfriends when you were younger grandma?”

“Oh yes of course, I
had very many. Plenty.”

“So, why did you pick grandpa then?”

She shakes her head laughing, “I have no idea…I'm so pretty. I had so many
boyfriends.”

There is no way you can be or stay depressed, sad, angry, or
negative in any way when you’re around my Grandma Rose. If I could bottle up
her spirit and sell it, I’d be on QVC faster than you could get your happy meal
at the drive through.

Come give Grandma a
hug

Grandma Rose’s warmth is combined with the fact that she
likes to kiss and hug everyone. She likes to touch people on the arm when they
speak. She’ll hold your hand as she leads you to the buffet at a picnic. She’ll
reach her hands out to you because she wants you to be closer so she can hear
you. At the convalescent hospital, the staff considers her as one nurse put it,
“she’s just the cutest thing.”

And that is a huge testament to Grandma because in that
hospital almost everyone there is at the end of their days mostly from old age,
and what was hard for me emotionally was to see all these people literally
wasting away. You can even see that the spirit has left their eyes already, because
there is something very lonely and depressing about spending the end of your
life in a cold hospital. But again, that’s if you let it. This is where Grandma
shows us different.

Grandma just won’t
die

Physically, as I mentioned, Grandma Rose is pretty much bed
ridden and because of that her legs look like little twigs. She can go out and
about in the hospital in her wheelchair. She has cataracts and has a hard time seeing,
and she has diabetes. She has also lost a good portion of her hearing which is
why she talks really loud. She has so many physical ailments that most people
would feel defeated but not my Rose.

There’s an on-going joke about my Grandma in that she just
won’t die. There have been 3 situations where the doctors have pretty much told
the family that she is a goner so go get her affairs in order now. People have
flown in from other countries to say their goodbyes, and when she was supposed
to be dead, somehow Granny will do a switcheroo and bam! She’s alive and
kicking.

Simultaneously it is flabbergasting and hysterical. I’ll
believe Grandma’s dead when she’s in her casket, but if Grandma has her way,
that won’t be for a long time because she just loves living so much. This is
one of my aspirations, to be like my Grandmother and continue to be so filled
with joy and love of life that the state of my physical body will not hinder
that spirit. You work with what you got versus trying to make what you got work
for you. That goes back to spirit-based thinking versus, ego-based thinking,
and something I wanted to share with all of you.

You are far more than
a body

We get so engrossed in our “container”; how it looks, how
much it weighs, how much it’s flawed, and on and on, that we forget that the
body is really only one small part of our totality. It’s one thing to want to
look good and take care of yourself, but it’s a whole other thing to let your
body ruin your day, your attitude about yourself, or steal joy from you just
because you don’t like the way it looks or because you don’t look pretty like
the girls in the magazines or what you think other people consider attractive.

What good is a pretty box if it’s filled with bitterness, anger,
and un-love? We spend more time making our box look prettier instead of filling
that box with beautiful, loving, vibrant spirit. Why? People are far more attracted to energy than packaging, and yet, so many of us, myself included, get dellusioned into giving more power to our packaging than what kind of energy we put out into the world. Would you rather be just a pretty box or be the light in someone's universe?

As I sat next to my grandmother on her bed holding her hand,
all I could see was this vibrant spirit that just rejects, absolutely refuses,
to let her body get in the way of her love of life and her feelings of joy. At
that moment, I got very clear about how much time and energy I continue to
spend on senseless things that do more to hinder my spirit than help it. Indeed, I have spent many years already healing much of the turmoil I had been carrying around, but the visit with Grandma brought me to a new level, a higher more expansive level. It was
like one of those moments in a cartoon where a coconut hits you on the head
and all of a sudden you see the light.

I saw the light through my grandmother’s light.  She invited me to her birthday because it’s
her favorite day of the year, a sentiment I share with my grandma. “It will be
a great celebration,” she beamed. Indeed it will be because Grandma Rose makes
everyone feel like a festivity, and I am one lucky granddaughter!

 

When I was checking out at Whole Foods, the cashier asked me, “So what are you cooking up for the blog today?” I’m there everyday, so I’m getting to know folks there. I’m becoming like Norm on Cheers.

I replied with a smile, “I am going to make a tofu scramble with onions, tomatoes, and chicken apple sausage.”

The cashier responded with a confused look on his face which I was kind of expecting because I figured some thought like this was going through his mind, “That doesn’t sound right, tofu scramble is  usually a vegan or vegetarian dish?”

So, I told him, “Yeah I know it sounds kinda weird because tofu scramble is usually a vegan/vegetarian dish so to add chicken apple sausage seems contradictory.”

He replied with relief, “Yeah, that’s exactly what I was thinking!”

I explained to him that I have an allergy to cow milk and chicken eggs but meat is okay so I have to be creative with the breakfast dishes in creating an egg-like experience because I don’t want to feel deprived. My philosophy too is that if something has the texture and taste (or very close to it) of something you want, is it really that big a deal what it’s made from as long as you get a good experience?

He said that made lots of sense. I find it rather fun actually when I’m able to get someone to think differently about food.

Onto the recipe….

 

Extra firm tofu when crumbled has very similar texture and consistency to scrambled egg whites. The trick though is taste. Tofu in itself is bland and can be unappealing to meat eaters or egg lovers, so the trick is going to be seasonings.

For those who can eat eggs, you might want to try the tofu because compared to the egg, tofu does not have cholesterol nor saturated fats. One egg has about 6g of protein and 79g of tofu, roughly 1/2 cup, has 8g of protein.

 

Ingredients (serves 2 large portions):

• One container extra firm tofu – I used Whole Foods 365 Organic Extra Firm Tofu
• One chicken apple sausage cut into slices. Use two sausages if you want more meat – I got a sausage at the Whole Foods meat counter.
• 1/4 onion sliced
• 1/2 tomato cubed
• Two cloves of garlic
• Sea salt or Garlic Salt
• Garlic Powder
• Black pepper
• Olive oil

Let’s get cooking:

 

• Heat a skillet pan to medium heat. Add about 1/2 tbsp olive oil and fry up the chicken apple sausage until it’s cooked all the way through. When finished cooking, take the sausage out of the pan and set it aside on a plate.

• I like to use the same skillet to take advantage of the oil and fat left over from cooking the sausage to help give the tofu some flavor. You can wash the skillet out or use a new pan, if you’d like to start fresh.

• Add 1 tbsp of olive oil to the heated skillet, and saute the garlic and onions for about a minute until the onions start to get wet looking. Toss in the cubed tomato and continue to mix everything together for about another minute so the tomato can get soft.

• For 1-2 servings, you’ll only need to use half of the tofu container. I like to use the other half to cook other dishes because I cook for just myself.

• Crumble the tofu into the pan so that you’re basically eliminating all the square edges. Here is where you get a bit creative and crumble the tofu so it looks like scrambled egg whites. While mixing the tofu in the pan, it will crumble more, so be gentle when mixing.

 

• Mix the tofu in with the garlic, onions, and tomato, then add salt, garlic powder, and some black pepper. Again, gentle with the mixing because the tofu breaks down faster in the heat.

• The seasoning is going to be the tricky part only in that it depends on your palate. The nice thing about tofu is that it easily takes on any flavoring you put on it. I used about 3 shakes of garlic salt, 2 shakes of black pepper, and about 5 shakes from the garlic powder container as I like garlicky taste. If you like spicy, try cayenne pepper. For other seasonings, try oregano, Italian Seasoning, or Trader Joe’s has a nice 21 Seasoning Salute that I like to use in cooking.

• Continue to mix everything together in the skillet for about 1-2 minutes. The tofu will start looking redish from the tomato. Toss in the chicken apple sausage, and mix in with the tofu, garlic, onion, and tomato. Heat for about another 30-0 seconds and you’re done.

Enjoy!

In this quick video [4 min.], I share what I think is probably the most important thing you need to consider when developing your personal brand and style online. Actually, you can apply the insight in this video to almost anything.

From my own experience, being clear on your “So what?” answer is what will help you attract a quality audience and sponsors/advertisers.

 

Hope all of you are having a fabulous day of love and joy!

xoxo,

Stephanie

 

The other day I tweeted a recipe for Spicy Garlic Shrimp with Kale and Quinoa which @drwinnie had created. The dish looked so delicious that I wanted to make a version that was dairy free. Also, instead of using tomato because I’ve been plenty of tomato sauces this week, I went with a lemony twist. 

 

Kale and Quinoa are two of my favorite power foods because they both have lots of flavor packed with nutritional benefits. Quinoa has plenty of protein and is a good alternative when you’re cutting down on meats or want more protein in food you can chew versus adding protein through protein powders for shakes and drinks.

Plus, this recipe is pretty easy to make. The only real time consuming thing is cooking the Quinoa.

Ingredients (makes 2-3 servings):

 

• 20-24 medium shrimps, thawed. I just bought some pre-frozen shrimp in a bag.

• 1 big handful of cut kale. I used enough to fit into a 2-cup bowl. Kale shrinks when it’s cooked but not as much as spinach. I’d guess to about 1/3 it’s original size. If you like kale, use more.

• 1 cup uncooked Quinoa. Makes about 3-cups when cooked.

• 1/2 lemon

• Diced garlic about 5 cloves

• 1 small shallot sliced

• Garlic powder 

• EVOO(olive oil)

• Sea salt

Let’s get cooking:

• Make the Quinoa first. Here’s how I cook Quinoa. The shrimp and kale part of the dish take almost no time to make, so since the Quinoa can take almost an hour, if you do the pre-soaking like I do, it’s best to cook the Quinoa first and then let it cool down while you cook the shrimp and kale.

• Thaw the shrimp if you bought pre-frozen. What I do is take the frozen shrimp and then soak them for about 10 minutes in a bowl of medium warm water from the sink. Using too hot water will start cooking the shrimp, so warm is good.

• In a saute pan on medium heat, put in about 1-1/2 tbsp of EVOO and add in the garlic and shallots. Saute until it starts to soften, then add in the shrimp and season with a few shakes of garlic powder and about a pinch or two of sea salt. Continue to saute the garlic, shallots, and shrimp and cook until the shrimp starts to turn pink.

 

• Toss the kale into the pan, and squirt about 1 tbsp of water on top of the kale. The water will help steam the kale. Mix the kale in with the garlic, shallots, and shrimp. Cover the pan for about a minute  so the kale can steam and shrink. Check on the kale to see if it’s at the level of softness you like. Mix it around. If you want the kale softer, cover the pan again. I like the kale to have a little bit of crunch so I don’t steam for too long.

• Now that the shrimp is cooked, taste one of the shrimps. If it needs more seasoning, add more garlic powder or salt. I added a little bit of pepper. Continue to mix everything.

• When the kale is to your liking, take the pan off the heat, and then squeeze the half lemon around the dish. Mix everything again in the pan.

Place the cooked Quinoa on a plate, and then top it with the garlic shrimp and lemony kale with shallots

Enjoy!

all pics taken with an iPhone 3GS

This year, part of me is really tempted to wallow in the pity pool this Valentine’s Day swaddled in a Snuggie reading trashy romance novels and noshing on chocolate covered woe-is-me because I’m still single and my Ex is now married.

I know. I know. I should be grown up and just get over it like any other mature adult but I’m just going to be honest and admit that a part of me still feels a little bit of the bitter sting around the heart more because I thought I would have at least had a serious relationship by now, but I do not. If I think about it too much, it makes me want to bundle myself up in a sleeved blanket of fleece and cry me a river with Justin Timberlake. Say hello to my woeful drama queen side.

BUT!

We are not going to wallow in pity or stuff bon bons in our pie hole as tempting as that may be because all that’s going to get us is frown lines and make us look like the morose spinster wrapped in some ridiculous As Seen on TV getup which really omg! is even too pathetic for a Lifetime movie.

SO! To help both you and me be in a more positive mood about Valentine’s Day coming up this weekend, here are 5 other things you can do to not be miserable and maybe even have a wonderful day of love.

• Be completely selfish: Think about all those couples who have to share and make compromises so both of them are happy on that day. Remember how stressful that was when you were once in coupledom. Now solo, you get to do whatever the hell you want without anyone’s permission, having to consider anyone’s feelings, or to compromise on what you really want to do. Make Valentine’s Day all about you and go do something you’ve always wanted to do.

• Give your inner Ms./Mr. Perfect the day off: Typically the voice in your head that is making you feel miserable about being single on Valentine’s Day is that inner perfectionist who has a set image of perfect love or an image you’re supposed to be hooked up with another because that is what everyone else is doing and you’re supposed to be a part of a twosome because well….because we’re all brainwashed to believe that we are incomplete until we find that one that completes us like in Jerry Maguire, “You complete me.” The only one that completes you is you darling.

• Get glammed up and go party with your other single friends: No doubt that you are not the only one who is single on Valentine’s Day so instead of each of you caving it up in your homes, get gussied up, put on the gloss & floss (G-string), and take your hot selves out to celebrate friendship and friends whom really our some of the great loves of our lives. Boyfriends/Girlfriends, Husbands/Wives, may have come and gone but your friends were still there with you. Life is short and do you really want to look back on this day and see yourself either sour-faced on the couch or giggling sipping on cocktails with your friends.

• Make love to yourself: Here’s the beauty of solo lovemaking. You know you are going to get lucky. You are guaranteed an orgasm, and you will get exactly what you want in bed because are you going to say no to you? No way! This is a chance to make sex all about you because heaven knows many of us know what bad sex is like. No one is more qualified to please you sexually than yourself.

• Write down 5 things you do have: When we are in miserable mode it is usually because we are mentally focused on what we don’t have, what we lack, like I DON’T HAVE a relationship. I DON’T HAVE a one and only, I DON’T HAVE a date. The DON’T HAVEs start to look really big when that’s all you center your attention on. So, get a paper and pen, and jot down at least 5 things you DO HAVE like for me I’d put I DO HAVE freedom. I DO HAVE parents who love me unconditionally. I DO HAVE love all around me.

The commercialization of Valentine’s Day makes us believe that you only have love if it looks like being part of a couple. The image of coupledom is what we buy into as having love but that is not true. If  you just look at love as love, energy, a feeling, and not package it or brand it like it’s some kind of product, you will start to see that you actually are surrounded by all kinds of love, it just looks different than what you have been focused on.

This Valentine’s Day weekend, one of my single girlfriends from California is coming out to visit me, and the two of us are going to have fun this weekend, doing something, I have no idea yet. But it will be fun because the intent and the friendship is there 🙂

Feel the love and enjoy your day of joie de vivre!

Ellen announced on her show that for this season, at least, she is completely cutting sugar out of her daily eating. Yup, she’s going cold turkey on the sweet stuff because she wants to have natural energy versus sugar-induced energy.

I’m excited about Ellen’s announcement, and secretly since the beginning of the year, I have made a commitment to start weaning from sugar myself. Admittedly, one of  two healthy habit changes I want to make for myself is to cut down my sugar consumption, and to wean from night eating. I am a notorious sweet tooth and night eater, and usually what I eat at night is sweet stuff like chocolate, ice cream, and cookies.

I like cold turkey better on a sandwich

I know there are many people who are working on either cutting out sugar or cutting way back on the sugar from their daily eating as well. My motivation is for overall health because I do know I eat too much sugar, and diabetes runs on both sides of my family. I may not avoid getting diabetes, but I can sure prolong it, and I’m all about prevention versus reaction.

On Twitter @puppyshine and I have been chatting about our journey to cut out the sugar in her case, and cut back in my case. In fact, if you go to her blog Whole Pup, she is blogging her nearly day-to-day experience of cutting out sugar. Brave woman!

For me, I cannot go completely cold turkey on the sugar. If I did, I will most surely have a nervous breakdown and be miserable. There is also no medical reason for me to go cold turkey, so I’m not going to aim for sugar free. I cut out artificial sweeteners about four years now, and it’s the best thing I’ve ever done.

 
“Oh how I love the delectable crunchiness of caramel covered popcorn!”

Fortunately I already don’t do the fake sweets

The only sugars I do eat are either raw cane sugar, agave nectar, or any natural sugars that Whole Foods uses in their baked goods or drinks they carry. Ditto with Trader Joes stuff. It may be higher quality sugar, but it’s still sugar and too much of it. Whole Foods is my sugar dealer as I am at the bakery almost every day. In fact, when I lived in the Bay Area, one month I spent $40 just in vegan cookies. Yeah, I know, it sounds like a sugar addiction. Luckily, there are no vegan cookies here in Phoenix which is both a bummer but good because the temptation has been eliminated.

If you go completely sugar free that also means many alcohols like my favorite Mojitos go to because they contain sugars in them, and ahem, I am sorry I am a writer and I need my booze. How else am I supposed to live my tormented creative life like Hemingway and Fitzgerald? Yeah okay, I have delusions of grandeur, but no matter, me cannot be completely alcohol free or sugar free. I need some vices even if it’s only tiny amounts like airplane liquor bottle size.

We go sugar little

So, in 2010 I am going sugar little which means I can have sugar in my life but in smaller doses. Right now, I did some food journaling and I’m eating about 80-90g of sugar a day which equals to about 6-1/2 to 7 tablespoons of sugar. According to the American Heart Association, the ideal amount of sugar intake in a day is about 25g or 2 tablespoons. So, yeah, like the average American, I am way over the ideal amount.

The eye opening part of my sugar consumption is that the bulk of it comes from drinks. Yeah, yikes! I drink most of my sugars in the form of sweetened iced teas, coffees, bubbly fruit drinks, juices, and Whole Foods 365 brand sodas. The other chunk of my sugar consumption comes from the fact that I eat some form of dessert every night in the likes of cookies, ice cream, rice krispy treats, or cake like doughy things.

And when it comes to desserts, I am also notoriously naughty at consuming the dairy and eggs because coming by vegan desserts besides sorbet at restaurants is nearly impossible. I totally forgo the food allergy attention because the sugar junkie in me doesn’t care. MUST have sugar! So, going sugar little is also going to help me get more disciplined about heeding my food allergies.

My sugar little goal

My goal is to get to the AHA ideal of 25g/ day or 175g/week. I figure, there might be times when I know I have to go to sweet laced events like a birthday party or a fancy dinner, and I want to enjoy a piece of cake or sorbet so I can conserve sugar rations on some days before the event and still stay on the 175g/week ideal.

I am going to do what I did when I weaned from Diet Coke, and not put a time deadline on reaching my ideal intake, and will it do it slowly and naturally. It took me nearly two years to completely wean from Diet Coke because I was seriously addicted to the stuff. I was drinking like 2-3 cans/day for years. I started by cutting out one can/day and doing that for about a month. Then I cut down to one can/day, and did that for about a month or two, then cut down to one can every other day, and so on.

I’m okay doing the slow wean because for my body and psyche namely the Inner resistance monster who hates change, tiny changes and slowly detaching makes the process less painful and makes the change stick for good. Today, I take one sip of Diet Coke and I become physically ill.

Come join the fun!

If you are weaning from sugar too or cutting it out, and would like some additional support and some ideas, check back here every Wednesday, as I will do Weaning Wednesday and report on what I’m doing that week in going sugar little.

Are you blogging or tweeting about your sugar wean/cut journey? Let me know in comments as I too am looking for others doing the same thing.

 

I usually workout in the mornings or at lunch time…one of the bennies of being a pro blogger. I do think that what you eat post workout is important because your body is feeling mighty awesome after that heart pumping exercise you’ve just done, so to keep the health goodness rolling, it’s ideal to eat something equally awesome.

What I typically eat post workout is a salad loaded with greens, my favorite being the Trader Joes Herb Salad Mix, and a cup of soup. In the picture, is some Amy’s Organic low sodium Split Pea soup. Ideally, I’d like to eat made from scratch soups like this simple 4-Ingredient, Creamy Dairy-Free Harvest Medley Soup I made the other day, but I don’t always have the time or money, so I get canned organic soups.

In my green salad, I’ll top it off with a protein like shredded chicken, turkey, or baked tofu, and a bunch of fixings from the salad bar like shredded carrot, beets, edamame, peas, lentils, and mandarin oranges. I’ll also add, walnuts or pumpkin seed to add some MUFAs. I go very light on the dressing because it’s good to savor the veggies and not drown it in Thousand Island.

So, what do you typically eat post workout?

Yesterday, I was at Target because I needed laundry detergent and contact lens solution. As I come through one of the aisles in the Health & Beauty section, bam, I’m smacked with this huge display of Giada De Laurentiis’ new cookware and food.

Of course, the wanna-build-an-empire-of-my-own part of me is intrigued so I must go check out Giada’s goods. I am particularly intrigued because there isn’t just cookware but food is included too like pasta, oils, and dressing.

The marketing/designer in me already likes the look and feel of the display, the cookware, and the packaging of the foods although it does look a bit Martha-ish. I like the color scheme because I’m partial to orange as you can see from my blog design. As usual Giada is looking like her perky radiant self. I still want to know what this woman’s secret is for being able to be around carbs, cheese, and desserts all day and yet stay so slim.

 

Being the touchy feely person I am, I go and nab a muffin pan, I grasp the pasta server and wooden spoons, and I clutch a saute pan. I want to feel the weight of these items and experience how it feels in my hands. I envision myself baking vegan banana nut muffins or sauteing garlic and shrimp in olive oil. I’m a sensory type of cook and I like my cookware to feel good and heavy thus my lust for cast iron.

I was kinda sad because these beautifully designed and packaged pieces of cookware felt limp in my hands. In fact, all the steel items felt like IKEA quality cookware. Now, I love IKEA but I never buy cookware there because again I like heavy and sound feeling. I’ll buy plates and glasses from IKEA but IKEA like cookware reminds me of my college days and early 20’s living in an apartment with three other girls. If you’re in that place in life right now or on a budget, then Giada’s stuff would be awesome to have a designer look at low cost then say shopping at Sur La Table , my cookware playground.

The one Giada item that I did think was cool and would consider buying is the Panini Pan with Press
because wait for it….it’s cast iron. Not available until Feb. 21, there is also a cast iron Braiser Pan with Lid
and Dutch Oven
.

As for the food, I looked at the ingredients and the pastas are basically just semolina and water. The dressing I saw was a vinaigrette and I got all the ingredients, no science project going on there. I don’t think I’d pay almost $3 though for a box of pasta when I can basically get the same stuff organic and cheaper at Whole Foods or Trader Joes.

I think it’s exciting that Giada has her own line at Target and it’s a good fit of the personalities. It’s nice to see other food celebs besides Martha in a mainstream chain.

Have you checked out Giada’s Target cookware or bought any of the pieces? What do you think?

Instead of just writing one of those generic lists we see all the time like, “5 Great Healthy Snack Ideas,” I thought today I’d just share some of the things I snack on to give you all a glimpse of what happens in my world 🙂

I go through these phases with food because although I have things I love and like to eat often, I do try and mix it up because well it’s fun!

So, here are 5 things I’ve been snacking on lately:

 

• Spicy Tuna or Vegetable rolls w/ avocado chunks: At Whole Foods in the sushi bar, they have these spicy tuna rolls that come in a pack of 8 rolls which are only tuna, rice, and seaweed. There are also simple vegetable rolls with carrots and cucumber. I’ll eat 4 one day, and 4 the next day. I’ll go buy an avocado because lately they’ve been on sale for $1/each. I get way more avocado and save some money than getting the rolls with the avocado in them.

• Sea’s Gift Korean Seaweed Snack : This snack you can find at Whole Foods or an Asian market in small individual sizes. What’s awesome about this snack is that you don’t even realize you’re eating seaweed because it’s crunchy, sweet, and just tasty. I LOVE it!  The seaweed is shredded so I like to add it on sushi rolls and even sprinkle it on green salad. It’s a nice twist instead of croutons, and it’s gluten-free. I’ll cut a slice of avocado and roll it in this shredded seaweed and eat it just like that. (in the pic above next to the roll is a small pile of the seaweed.)

• Kiwi: Kiwis are little, so I’ll slice a whole one up and just eat it plain. Kiwis are a little bit more fun than your basic apple or orange which tends to make me feel like I’m eating “I’m on a diet” food.

 

• Trader Joe’s Pita Bite Crackers w/ fresh ground peanut butter: I just discovered these Pita Bite Crackers at TJs and what is cool is that 9 of these crackers are 120 calories total. The bites are about 1-3/4″ in diameter, and 9 crackers is pretty filling.

I’ve also been getting fresh ground peanut butter because at Whole Foods you can ground exactly the amount you want and it’s nothing but peanuts and salt. I don’t like buying whole jars of PB because I get tempted to eat way too much. With the ground-to-order, I get about 1/2 cup max and can make that last quite awhile. I guess it’s just a mental thing.

• Watermelon juice: This is a snack where I drink my calories. The other day I took a snapshot of my desk as I was working on a proposal sipping on watermelon juice. It’s a nice change of pace from coffee.

So, what have you been snacking on lately?

 

Let’s sip on some water as we sit at the bar waiting for our plate of Butternut squash enchiladas to arrive. I’ll share with you my story of, “Lost in Servitude” which takes place in many households.

I used to deal with my feelings of loneliness and abandonment by eating bags of Oreos. There was something very calming to me about separating the cookie and then licking the luscious creamy center just like in the commercials. When Double Stuffed Oreos came out, I was in creme heaven. I didn’t always eat the cookie part as I mostly just wanted the creamy center. In reflection, it seems clear that some part of me was looking for a similar situation, I wanted to be a center.

Finding our self in secondary position

After @BigGirlBombshel asked me a fabulous question, “30lbs Gone & Stayed Off For 2 Years: What Came First, Diet & Exercise or Attitude?,” on her wonderful blog, she profiled me as a bombshell who lives authentically.

After my profile, in her post, Julie went on to write about how we can lose ourselves typically in relationships. The part of her post that really struck me was this:

“We abandon ourselves.  Our wants and needs become secondary.  We
put our energy into wearing all the different hats of being good.  A
good friend, Mom, daughter, employee, wife or girlfriend.  What happens
to the ME inside?  Their isn’t much time or energy left to take care of
ourselves.“

That one paragraph basically summarizes how I operated in my teenage years and 20’s. Busy being oldest child  Ms. Perfect, I put everyone else first and me second. In fact, at one point when I was in college, I got a good gobsmacking of just how much I was losing myself to my family. I was doing family therapy with my parents and two brothers because my youngest brother was in and out of juvenile hall at the time, and the city we lived in required family therapy as part of my brother’s rehabilitation.

In one session, talking escalated to yelling at each other because my inner resentments couldn’t be contained anymore like a firecracker that’s just been lit. I finally started to speak up because I felt safe in the therapist’s office to be open because she wanted to know what our dsyfunctions were so I took it as an opportunity to tell the truth…at least my truth. During the quarreling, the therapist stopped us, looked at me and asked, “If you are busy taking care of everyone else, who is taking care of you and your needs?”

…My inner Ms. Perfect brainwashed me into believing that I was being the good girl serving others when really I wasn’t honoring who I was …

{insert deer in headlights look. Gobsmacked!}

The light bulb finally turns on

Instantly, the room became silent. I remembering sitting in my chair looking at everyone for an answer. Still, only silence. It instantly hit me that, um, there was no one. No one was taking care of or paying attention to my needs…including me.

That day in family therapy changed my life because I clearly saw how much of my resentments, anger, and depression was tied to the fact that I really resented all those people, namely my family members, that I had bent over backwards for and yet who did not even remotely do the same for me.

There was no mutual give and receive. There was mostly, Stephanie gives, and others take. Part of me would secretly hope that I would get mine in return, but it never happened, so I stewed and Ms. Perfect just accepted it as that’s what you do when you’re perfect. I would then go and eat half a bag of Oreos to drown my feelings of hopelessness.

Servitude versus Service

In reality, when you are serving only others and not yourself (at all), what has happened is that you are operating in servitude versus in service. My inner Ms. Perfect brainwashed me into believing that I was being the good girl serving others when really I wasn’t honoring who I was and thus lost myself. Instead of being Stephanie, I became the servant….and a bitter one at that.

The lesson for me in that experience with my family was that I also needed to be better about asking for what I needed because I rarely did that. It never dawned on me to directly ask for what I wanted or needed because I would assume they could just see what I needed. I could it see it in them so they should be able to see it in me, right? {insert chuckles}

I also needed to learn how to set boundaries and learn to say no. I had a really hard time saying no to people, thinking that I was super woman and could handle it all. What happened in reality was that I did a bunch of things half-assed, and was busy and tired doing stuff for others and not things for myself.

Being in service of others means there is mutual giving and receiving. There is also mutual communication and respect for needs. It’s not necessarily a ping pong back and forth like you do this for me and I’ll do this for your exchange, but more a feeling of balance and a feeling that we are in this together in partnership with each other.

Truth be told, after that day in the therapist’s office, it took me a good decade to really get to the point where I had good balance between being there for others as well as myself. Some habits ingrained in your DNA can take a long time to break, and for me it was getting clear about being in service versus servitude.

Have you found yourself in a place of servitude versus service, and how did you move forward from it?

One of the things that greatly contributed to me not only shedding 30lbs and keeping it off for two years now, but also aided in creating a healthier me is my food philosophy which I call, “eating wellness” which is basically eating your way to vibrant health through better food choices.

I can tell you from personal experience that I had a myriad of health issues like depression, cantankerous bowels, gas, rashes, eczema, and weight gain all but disappear once I started eating better foods suited to work well for my body.

In this quick video, I explain what eating wellness means to me, and how it can help you on your journey to more vibrant health.

 

I got creative with the soup action this week. I wanted to make a simple butternut squash soup, and headed over to Trader Joe’s to buy a bag of pre-cut butternut squash. I love how TJ’s will cube and package in a handy bag those hard to cut veggies like squash. The hardest part of cutting up a whole squash for me is skinning it. I lose patience and end up driving to Trader Joe’s. On this day though, I found something new…

I get to TJs and they do not have any butternut squash. I am crushed because my mouth had been watering for butternut for a couple days now. Instead, TJs had this Fresh Harvest Medley which contained a mix of yam, butternut squash, and turnip. It looked interesting so I thought I’d give it a try since there was at least some chunks of my favorite butternut squash in there. I’m glad I tried it!

 

The creamy twist

I love cream based soups but because of the dairy allergy, I have had to be creative and simulate the experience of creamy soup without it actually having cream in it…or more specific cow milk cream. I have however found another cream that is vegan, gluten-free, tasty, and will create a creamy like experience. That is what I mean by a twist because you will hardly see this ingredient in a soup recipe…yet. Oh yeah! I think more people will be trying it out, says the trend predictor in me.

Also, I’ve discovered like many others who cook vegan or dairy-free that with the right amount of boiling, pureeing, and liquid, you can whip almost anything up into a frenzy until it’s creamy. If you’ve ever owned a Vita-Mix blender, you know what I’m talking about.

5-ingredient or less dishes are in the trend now so this soup fits right in this mix with 4-ingredients. In fact, you could make this soup with 3-ingredients but the 4th is one of my favorites because I like things on the sweeter side. Also, there is no cutting involved. All you need is a can opener and food processor or blender.

Ingredients (serves 4 medium size bowls):

• 1-package Trader Joe’s Fresh Harvest Medley
• 1-14oz. can organic chicken broth or vegetable broth to make the soup vegan. I use Whole Foods 365 brand broth.
• 1/4 cup So Delicious Coconut Milk Creamer (this stuff has some thickness and it rocks for all kinds of things besides coffee! I used the French Vanilla flavor, but there is also Original and Hazelnut.)
• 1/2 tbsp agave nectar
• sea salt to season (I don’t consider salt an ingredient because you don’t really need it if you get salted broth. I did however use a pinch.)

Let’s get cooking:

• In a medium saucepan, boil the Harvest Medley together with the can of broth for 25-30 minutes. Add a pinch of salt in if you’d like more salt than what the broth has already. The squash should mush when you press a spoon to it. If it’s disintegrating in the pan into a gooey mush, the Medley has been over-cooked.

• Let the heated Medley cool down for about 20 minutes in the pan. Pour the mixture into a food processor or blender, add in the coconut creamer, and agave nectar. I added a 1/4 cup of water to thin out the soup a bit. Whip into a frenzy until the mixture is creamy.

• Taste. Season according to your palate if the soup needs more.

There will only be a whisper of coconut taste in the soup. If you add about 1/8 cup more of the coconut creamer, you will start to taste the coconut which could be interesting if you want a Thai-like flavoring to your squash soup. I tried it and thought it would make for an interesting starter if you were doing a Fusion themed lunch or dinner party. The French Vanilla flavoring and agave add a subtle sweetness to the soup because I added just a small amount.

I’ve been really loving the So Delicious line of coconut-milk products because they’ve done an excellent job of minimizing the coconut taste which can be over-powering.

Enjoy the soup!

 

Normally, I’m not into the bagged salad greens because at Whole Foods in the produce section you can get in bulk mixed greens, spinach, arugula, or in select WFs stores fancy schmancy exotic mix with things like beet greens and chards. When I get the bulk greens, I feel more like I’m at the farmer’s market on the weekend than at a grocery store.

On lazy days, the thing I do appreciate about bagged salad greens is that all you have to do is open the bag, grab a handful, put it on a plate, and voilah, salad is ready to eat. There is one bagged salad green combo that I absolutely love, and it’s Trader Joe’s Organic Herb Salad Mix. 

 

Here’s why I LOVE this combo mix:

• It’s certified USDA organic

• At my local TJ’s, the mix is around $2/bag, and a whole bag can last me four salads which I can easily do in two days or stretch out to three days if I make sure to keep the salad air tight.

• The mix includes four of my favorite things: dill, frisee, arugula, and radiccchio. I love the texture of frisee, and the pinches of dill make a HUGE taste difference. I love dill, but I don’t like to buy a whole bunch just to put a little in a green salad. Whoever at TJs thought of adding the dill is a genius in my book.

• The other greens in this Herb Salad mix include: romaine, oak leaf, Lollo Rosa, tango, red & green chard, mizuna, parsley, and cilantro. This mix of greens not only make for a great taste and interesting texture combo but also make a beautiful presentation.

Try out the mix and let me know what you think. What other ready-to-eat bagged salad green brands/combos do you like?

Let’s enjoy some slices of fresh baked French loaf, cubes of goat cheese, and fine red wine as we talk about what came first, diet and exercise or attitude?

@BigGirlBombshel asked me an excellent question about my recent weight loss journey where I shed 30lbs and have kept it off two years now. She wanted to know, “What came first diet and exercise or attitude?”

The answer to her question is important because it was the key in me not only keeping that weight off but in me getting to a place where the scale is no longer the boss of me, and I no longer live with the constant anxiety and fear of gaining weight again. Don’t get me wrong, I still get those body insecurities but I don’t punish my body or myself any more like I used to. I’m in a calm and stable place when it comes to my weight and how I feel about my body.

But first, a little story about a breakup

I gained those 30lbs during my relationship with the Ex. We lived together over 3-years, and I wanted to get married and he did not…at least to me. Our breakup was amicable at the time, and I had started my weight loss journey a couple months before we broke up. At the time of the breakup I had dropped about 15 pounds.

Soon after the breakup, I had a bulimia relapse not just because of the ending with the boyfriend, but my business partner and I broke up too which was much more bitter than the breakup with the Ex, and it shattered my blog network business dreams. And to add to the stress, I was struggling to make a living, and had to ask my parents to help me out financially. That was a pride sucking thing for this independent woman. With all that stress happening at the same time, I simply broke and reverted back to my old familiar coping mechanism.

And as much as that sounds like a typical sad country music song, I did manage to rise from the ashes and turn that experience into something that not only helped me grow as a person, but also helped catapult my blogging career. The only reason I am able to share such personal stories about my life is because my intent is clear. I share my experience to help others feel either less alone or stigmatized because I know exactly how that feels like.

So, who did the Ex marry?

Two years later, the Ex is married to someone four years older than his daughter. That’s right and now is a good point to pour another glass of Merlot.

They live in a house on top of a hill where I wanted to buy a house one day. She gets the nice view and I got the 70’s shag carpet apartment. Truth be told, one of the reasons that contributed to me leaving the Bay Area was that I had yet another Ex who got married after dating me, and I was done trying to avoid seeing any of them. Sometimes, I feel like my role is to get the guy ready for the one he’s supposed to marry. The Bay Area just felt like the graveyard of my past, and it made me depressed. In a new town, I have new opportunity to start fresh, and so far in four months, moving to Phoenix has been the best thing for me.

But sharing about the Ex is not about bitterness, I do genuinely wish them happiness and I’m happy because I have dated other people, and I know that I can have something far more fulfilling than I had with the Ex. He’s not a bad guy. He and I just don’t make for lifetime partners.

I share this because it is about gaining perspective, and helping me grow. Well, in this specific case, in the beginning, it was fake it til you make it kind of growth because really I didn’t know what bothered me more, that he got married before me or that his new love was born when I was about to enter high school. I’d like to think I was more mature than that, but um, no, apparently not…not when it comes to the Ex. I discovered parts of myself that were far more shallow than I imagined. The upside in this discovery is that you can’t fix what you don’t know is broke. I know what’s broke and can fix it.

…You will make better choices because you are operating from a place of wholeness versus incompleteness. …

I mention the Ex only because that news is something that would normally make me want to drown my sorrows in all-you-can-eat buffets and tubs of Ben & Jerrys, and put that 30lbs right back on. I would stuff those, “I wasn’t good enough because I’m too old” feelings in a vat of Cool Whip covered Chocolate Fudge Brownie. Before the ice cream, I would of course eat pizza and french fries because what else goes well with sweet and the taste of woe-is-me…salty. This mish mosh of calorie, guilt laden foods would then trigger the ED issues.

Forget the fact too that I’m allergic to dairy. When your Ex didn’t marry you because he was better suited to marry someone born in the 80’s when he was born in the 60’s, there is no such thing as feeling logical or wanting to be the bigger person. When you are optimistic yet still single and living on a budget while your friends are now becoming CEOs, VPs, Chancellors, and their kids are now heading into Junior High and they are traveling and living well accomplished lives, there is only sweet gooey caramel laced ice cream to make things feel all better…at least that’s what you believe at the time.

But that was the old way

Reaching to food first to calm me or numb me emotionally would have been my old pattern, and the universe has certainly tested me with some pretty hard homework lately. But this time around, I did something different. Instead of emo eating, I expressed anger, hurt, and disappointment…to him, to my diary, to my friends, to my parents, to my doctors/healers. Instead of eating to numb the hurt, I let it out. I gave my hurt a voice and let it speak…out loud, not only to those I needed to be forthright with but with the blogosphere.

Letting my hurt emotions out and giving them a voice is something very new to a classic bottler and stewer. But I was like that for years, and yes I did hear Dr. Phil’s voice, “And so how’s that been working for you?”

Well frankly Dr. Phil, you know the answer, and so does the guest you’re asking. Obviously, it’s not working out, and I am too old and too damn tired to keep doing the same old thing and get the same frustrating and unhealthy results. So, instead of getting up on the soapbox and declaring, “Oh I’m gonna change!” for yet the umpteenth time, I just started making adjustments. I took tiny action and took things one moment at a time.

Thank goodness for Plan G

When things got stressful and I wanted to eat a whole bag of Cheese Curls, I would no longer say to myself, “Oh you can’t have that. That is bad food.” I would say to myself, “Ok, choice time. You can have that bag of cheesy poofs if you want them, but will this help you get closer to your goal faster or not? What do you want more the puffs or the taste of being at your goal sooner? No choice is good or bad, it’s just what do you want more?”

Because I gave my inner 19 year-old supermodel pain body choices and was non-judgmental, and more importantly didn’t say “No!”, she would always choose staying in our skinny jeans, and she would quietly go back to her room. We have calm. Before, if I fought her, we’d get into these raging, temperamental fights where she always won and then would whip out the weapons of mass self-destruction, and show me just who was the one with authoritah as Cartman would say in South Park.

The most important attitude change though is that I now live feeling like a whole person. I am whole. I still get the insecure feelings, but they no longer drive my life like they used to. I let go of those incessant “missing pieces” feelings like if I get the husband, the money, or being back in the skinny jeans, it will make me feel whole because from past experience, I got some of those missing pieces, and I still felt incomplete and unhappy.

New code in the brain

It took me forever to learn that lesson, “I am whole,” and I am now programmed that way, if we can use brainwashing to our advantage. In my opinion and what has worked for me, knowing that you are whole is by far the most important thing that anyone can adopt in order to live a healthy and thriving life.

When you fully grasp and understand that you are whole, the habit changes needed to hep you get that healthy thinner body you want will start to happen naturally. You will make better choices because you are operating from a place of wholeness versus incompleteness.

Change won’t happen over night. It took time to create a state of un-wellness, and it will take time to heal and grow from it. You must be patient and kind to yourself, and trust that the changes will start to happen. It’s amazing how resilient the body is when you start working more in partnership with it.

I’m able to keep the weight off and have more inner calmness because I made attitude adjustments first…and then the diet and exercise followed suit. For years, I did it the other way around and all that happened was that I gained the weight back and was still unhappy, and still controlled by the scale. I used to believe that once I got back into my skinny jeans THEN I could work on my internal issues because well the skinny jeans are a magical glass slipper where everything turns into a fairy tale, right? {insert bursts of laughter}

I’m in a strong place today, but I’m realistic and know it is still a day to day thing and a choice which is why I continue to blog, tweet, and share because the journey is far more enriching when you have a support system as cool as those kindred spirits you will meet in the interwebs 🙂

So how about those of you who have dropped weight and kept it off for years. What came first for you, the diet and exercise or attitude?