{"id":113024,"date":"2009-12-15T17:07:59","date_gmt":"2009-12-15T22:07:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.bssd.org\/?p=3263"},"modified":"2009-12-15T17:07:59","modified_gmt":"2009-12-15T22:07:59","slug":"gobble-gobble-cluck-cluck","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/113024","title":{"rendered":"Gobble, Gobble, Cluck, Cluck"},"content":{"rendered":"

by c. odinzoff\"turkey\"<\/p>\n

Dinner. What a happy family. All gathered around the table celebrating one of the U.S\u2019s oldest traditions.\u00a0 Thanksgiving. Mashed potatoes, green beans, stuffing, corn, cranberry sauce, yummy blueberry and apple pie and my good friend Bert the Turkey! Poor old Bert. He wasn\u2019t even twenty yet in turkey years. Please don\u2019t eat me! I\u2019m too young to taste good! And if you do decide to eat me, remember, you are what you eat.<\/p>\n

Even though turkeys may seem healthy because grain and plants, you never know if I\u2019m sick or not. I could have the bird flu! Or, I could have some type of lice on my feathers when you pluck me. So maybe you should pick a different turkey to smother and serve on the table. You know, I often do have a lot of gas, especially when I\u2019m unconscious.\u00a0 I might look like a perfect, juicy, very delicious turkey, but on the inside it\u2019s a whole different story.<\/p>\n

Did you know that the turkey population is endangered? Yes, that\u2019s why you shouldn\u2019t eat us any more.\u00a0 That\u2019s one less turkey in the U.S. for you.\u00a0 My people (the Turkeys) are the ones that help to reproduce. It\u2019s like biting the hand that feeds you.\u00a0 You should take pity on the turkeys. The turkeys have always been nice to the humans. The humans have been nice to us, until it was judgment day. Take your madness out on the chickens!<\/p>\n

How will you feel if a group of turkeys came to your house and killed you and got you ready for thanksgiving dinner hundreds of years ago?\u00a0 You would probably be the one writing this paper right now, not me. You wouldn\u2019t like getting killed just to be eaten.\u00a0 I might taste good, but maybe so do you.\u00a0 You people call it tradition, but I call it hunger.<\/p>\n

People say this tradition has been around for hundreds of years cine the pilgrims Well, I say start a new tradition.\u00a0 Kill chickens for turkey\u2019s sake! Roosters, swans, I don\u2019t care! Anything but turkeys.\u00a0 The tradition is getting too old. I miss Bert. Why?! Bert was the turkeyest friend that you could ever have. He was the best. But, back to my point.\u00a0 No more turkey slaughter!<\/p>\n

Please don\u2019t eat me! or any other turkey for that matter.\u00a0 Turkeys can be a good pet\u2014they don\u2019t have to be a good tasty main dish for a family dinner. I\u2019m asking nicely.\u00a0 Please don\u2019t eat turkeys anymore.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by c. odinzoff Dinner. What a happy family. All gathered around the table celebrating one of the U.S\u2019s oldest traditions.\u00a0 Thanksgiving. Mashed potatoes, green beans, stuffing, corn, cranberry sauce, yummy blueberry and apple pie and my good friend Bert the Turkey! Poor old Bert. He wasn\u2019t even twenty yet in turkey years. Please don\u2019t eat […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":975,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-113024","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/113024","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/975"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=113024"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/113024\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=113024"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=113024"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=113024"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}