{"id":139836,"date":"2010-01-05T08:18:32","date_gmt":"2010-01-05T13:18:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beyonceworld.net\/?p=852"},"modified":"2010-01-05T08:18:32","modified_gmt":"2010-01-05T13:18:32","slug":"rings-and-alarms","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/139836","title":{"rendered":"Rings and Alarms"},"content":{"rendered":"

– via <\/em>The New Yorker<\/em><\/p>\n

The team who come closest to Mosley and Garrett in terms of sonic bravado and melodic grace are C. (Tricky) Stewart and Terius (The-Dream) Nash. Their latest offering is \u201cSingle Ladies,\u201d one of two new Beyonc\u00e9 songs to reach the market simultaneously. As brands go, Beyonc\u00e9 is still close to a sure bet, and \u201cSingle Ladies\u201d shows everyone involved acting unafraid of any market fluctuations. Beyonc\u00e9\u2019s vocals unfold over a stomping kick and handclap, as if a clutch of people have formed a ring around her and she\u2019s decided to improvise a song. There are some synthesizer noises but they feel unrelated to anything Beyonc\u00e9 is singing. When, much later than you expected, there is finally some harmonic information from a keyboard, it is a wobbly, gothic figure that seems to have hopped movies sets. \u201cToday\u2019s Single Ladies\u201d gets temporarily spliced with \u201cCybertooth 9.\u201d And then the sound goes away\u2014Beyonc\u00e9 and her lecture are the focus here. This, on acoustic guitar? Not so easy.<\/p>\n

Beyonc\u00e9, for all her traditional behavior as good-looking good girl, is building a catalogue of songs that have little to do with traditional expressions of love or pain. She is most fond of the second person, and her hits, in the aggregate, form a sort of default advice column. She isn\u2019t as interested in her own pain as she is in telling others what mistakes not to make. I\u2019ve made a small list of her key talking points, reaching back to her work in Destiny\u2019s Child:<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, No, No\u201d: Be entirely clear with your partner; vague language can lead to confusion and hurt feelings.<\/p>\n

\u201cBills, Bills, Bills\u201d: Money and romance do not mix, so keep separate bank accounts and go Dutch until your relationship is stable.<\/p>\n

\u201cBug-A-Boo\u201d: Constant communication can feel more like harassment than affection.<\/p>\n

Read the rest after the jump.<\/p>\n

<\/span>\u201cSay My Name\u201d: If your partner is avoiding you, arrange a face-to-face meeting. Monosyllabic answers and lack of affection can be an indication of deeper troubles.<\/p>\n

\u201cJumpin\u2019, Jumpin\u2019\u201d: Couples do not necessarily need to spend every night together. Plan one night a week where you are with your friends, and he with his.<\/p>\n

\u201cIndependent Women Part 1\u201d: If you pay for your own shoes, you are more likely to judge your relationship on its own merits rather than as a tallying of goods exchanged. (Get Cameron Diaz to help you count your belongings, if you feel like you\u2019re losing track.)<\/p>\n

\u201cBootylicious\u201d: If you are more experienced than your partner, make sure to be explicit about your needs and expectations. Direct questions will save time and decrease anxiety. (Comfortable jelly levels, for example, should be established early on in any relationship.)<\/p>\n

\u201cCheck On It\u201d: If a man shows sustained interested, allow him to get close to you over dinner, or a movie. Leave your options open. If he has a friend, perhaps invite him along; the friend can act as a control group for the evening.<\/p>\n

\u201cRing The Alarm\u201d: Fights are not always unhealthy. Sometimes, a blowout can be cathartic and release pressure that might be damaging your ability to communicate. Introduce a sense of play into your arguments\u2014megaphones are fun (make sure your neighbors are familiar with your routine, and don\u2019t call the police), and role-playing can help defuse anger with humor.<\/p>\n

\u201cIrreplaceable\u201d: If your ex is having trouble finding his way out of the house, provide clear and consistent directions. Men are sometimes challenged by the word \u201cstraight,\u201d which has sexual overtones. Suggest that he go left or right, terms familiar from both baseball and driving. Also, keep several empty boxes on hand. (Once broken down flat, boxes can fit horizontally into a closet or under a leaky houseplant.)<\/p>\n

\u201cFreakum Dress\u201d: Be sure you own at least one freakum dress. If you find one you really like, consider buying several of them in different colors. (Make sure you have a friend who can explain what a freakum dress is.)<\/p>\n

\u201cSingle Ladies\u201d: If a man values your relationship, be prepared to demand a commitment. Suggest that he signal the value of his commitment by buying you an enormous piece of jewelry, something big enough to kill a hamster with one mild blow.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

– via The New Yorker The team who come closest to Mosley and Garrett in terms of sonic bravado and melodic grace are C. (Tricky) Stewart and Terius (The-Dream) Nash. Their latest offering is \u201cSingle Ladies,\u201d one of two new Beyonc\u00e9 songs to reach the market simultaneously. As brands go, Beyonc\u00e9 is still close to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":750,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-139836","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/139836","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/750"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=139836"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/139836\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=139836"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=139836"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mereja.media\/index\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=139836"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}