First, why do we park on driveways, yet we drive on parkways?
If the opposite of pro is con, then is the opposite of progress, congress?
When you’re on a plane and the pilot says over the loudspeaker, "We are now making our final approach." Our final approach? What happens if we don’t make it?
Years ago, I passed an International House of Pancakes and they had a big sign in the window that said, "We Have Menus In Braille". I mean, sure, you could see the sign from the street, but….
There was a TV commercial years ago for Brylcreem. In the commercial, high school football players would exit a bus, and as they exited, one would say, "I came back."
The next one said, "I came back".
The third one said "I came back….to Brylcreem!"
A cheerleader then said, "And we’re glad they did!"
Okay, if the stuff was so great, why did they leave in the first place?
Another one that I’ve thought a lot about…..they say that Rome wasn’t built in a day, so does that mean it was built in the night?
Why do they say that honesty is the best policy, when, if you are honest, you lose your job….or get expelled from school, or get locked up, or your spouse divorces you?
If we evolved from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?
I have three digital clocks that are synchronized with the atomic clock in Colorado, and that clock is supposed to be the most accurate clock in the world. It’s accurate to 1 second every million years. What do they check it with?
If you buy a bottle of glue, why doesn’t it stick to the inside of the bottle?
If you exit an expressway, and the off ramp says, "Safe Speed 20mph", if you go 40, will you be twice as safe?