Author: Kristen Bassick

An age old dilemma, – which is more powerful and important – brains or beauty?  Would you rather be hideously ugly and brilliant, or stunningly beautiful and unable to carry a conversation?

Of course none of us really wants to be either of those things.  We want to be brilliant and stunningly beautiful.  And rich.  And happy.  And living on an island with a cabana boy named Juan who fulfills our every desire…

Maybe that part is just me.

We have all been lead to believe that we should want it all and that we can get it all and if we don’t want and have it all, there is something wrong with us.  However, I now have some scientific proof that the choice between brains and beauty is more real than you may have thought!

In late April, the Wall Street Journal published an article, entitled “A Case for those Extra 10 Pounds”, that said that, while the recommendations are to control calories and make healthy diet choices, it seems that there is actually some benefit that comes from being 10-15 pounds overweight.  A little extra weight can lead to a lower risk of osteoporosis and even make you look younger.

Bring on the ice cream!

Just as I was really settling into my celebration of the joys of science, a new study came out that says that extra fat is linked to smaller brain volume, and potentially linked to Alzheimer’s Disease.  Lucky for me and my desire to continue to eat ice cream, it is unclear whether smaller brains lead to extra fat or vice versa.  I am pulling for the first one.  The idea of fat causing my brain to shrink is disturbing in more ways than one.

So extra fat causes Alzheimer’s, and too little fat causes osteoporosis.  A little extra fat will keep my face unlined and youthfully full, but may cause me to eventually forget my name. Am I willing to give up the ice cream to reduce the risk of dementia?

Is it wrong that I am not sure which way to go on this?

I am admittedly not the trendiest girl around.  I don’t have designer shoes or a luxury car or get my hair blown out.  Actually, where I live getting your hair blown out means you drove with a window open, but I don’t do that much either.  The NYC crowd would have a field day with how un-cool I am with my suburban clothes and addiction to Dunkin’ Donuts iced coffee.  I am about as mainstream as they come, and for this I am generally unapologetic.  It’s who I am and I’m OK with that.

Although un-hip, I am quite interested in doing things to keep myself and my family healthy.  I try mightily to get my children to willingly eat vegetables. I don’t cook red meat. I choose fresh ingredients rather than food-in-a-box whenever possible.  I am embarking on an experiment to be a vegetarian, and I recently gave up caffeine for a month.  I am willing to try new things – within reason.

There was a recent article in the New York Times about the popularity of a fermented tea drink called kombucha.  Apparently this tea can do all kinds of magical things like re-growing hair, calming digestive issues and curing hangovers.  Those who drink it claim that it is quite delish.  Sounds good, right?  I’m in! I could be the first one in the suburbs to partake of this delightful elixir!  How do I get it?

This is where things get a little hairy for me.  Because kombucha is made by immersing a disk of bacteria into brewed tea and letting it sit, unrefrigerated, for up to two weeks.

A disk of bacteria.

In your tea.

On purpose.

I am so not down with that.

I understand the benefits of probiotics.  I eat yogurt (from the refrigerator, thank you very much).  But, I have to admit that I wouldn’t even drink the plain tea if it sat out for two weeks – and the introduction of the bacteria disk into the equation does nothing to improve the situation for me.

I suppose the nature of kombucha is essentially similar to beer.  Fermented substances in a drink are not that uncommon.  And yet, I can’t quite get my head around voluntarily introducing bacteria into a completely acceptable drink like tea.  I guess I don’t brew my own beer either, although I do enjoy drinking it.

There are packaged versions of kombucha available, including one made by Red Bull.  I am slightly more comfortable with the manufactured versions, mostly because I work under the assumption that beverage manufacturers are as terrified of being sued as I am of dying of kombucha poisoning.

I am a big sucker for slick marketing and putting anything, even something utterly disgusting, in a pretty bottle and giving it a fun name goes a long way to drawing my interest.  If I actually went out and purchased a Carpe Diem Kombucha, it would be an ultimate marking success for them.

Ooooo…pretty bottle….fancy name…who cares what’s in it?  I must have it!

I want to be cool and brave enough to jump on this bandwagon and give kombucha a try.  But the reality is that it’s probably beyond my capabilities to be that cool and brave.  And the Dunkin’ Donuts coffee is working just fine for me, thanks!