Author: Castina

Never one to mince words, ’80s catwalk staple and ousted America’s Next Top Model judge Paulina Porizkova refers to Heidi Montag as “a cheap plastic pool float” (Actually, that’s a pretty good comparison) in a controversial new Modelina.com blog posting that laments her “outrage” over the string of young stars who have augmented their bodies as of late.

Paulina writes: “Wouldn’t Audrey Hepburn, Jane Birkin, Twiggy, Charlotte Rampling, and Jean Harlow have lost their special brand of elegant, feline sexiness if they were tipping over under the weight of great ol’ mammaries? Compare any one of these natural beauties to someone like Heidi Montag, and it’s like comparing a Hastens Swedish handmade mattress to a cheap plastic pool float…..”

Ouch! Twitter Rant From Spencer Pratt Coming In 5, 4, 3, 2…..

Standing firmly on the argument that true beauty in about being unique, Paulina — no stranger to cosmetic surgery herself — also fires off at the newly-busty Kate Hudson, who the former supermodel claims has cheapened her good looks after going under the knife to increase her cup size.

“My issue here isn’t with Kate. If big boobs make her happier, then more power to her. The issue here, this fixing something perfect to something else perfect, is so much a sign of our times, and one that truly saddens me….”

Eternal killjoy Joe Jackson doesn’t sound very pleased about his late son’s life being turned into a circus.

The penny-pinching stage parent – whose pop legend son Michael died from acute Propofol intoxication last June – says he doesn’t understand why world-renowned Canadian performance troupe Cirque du Soleil want to travel the world with a show about the “Thriller” star.

“That’s something else, isn’t it? I won’t see it,” the Jackson patriarch replied dryly when probbed for his thoughts about the Cirque show by reporters this week.

On Tuesday, the circus group struck a deal with the Jackson estate, which will see the production become a residency in Las Vegas from 2012 and will feature expansive acrobatics and dance routines set to the late King of Pop’s songs.

While Joe is unhappy with the show, his estranged wife Katherine Jackson is delighted about the show, which will provide Michael’s estate with 50 percent of all profits.

“Our family is thrilled that Cirque du Soleil will pay tribute to my son in such an important way,” Mrs. Jackson remarked.

On Wednesday, Life & Style Weekly published a scoop which claimed that its been more than a year since cranky Kate Gosselin’s had her corn shucked (Use your imagination….) by a member of the opposite sex. Proving that desperate times call for desperate measures, Kate’s reportedly resorted to scraping the bottom of the barrel in her search for steady lovin’ — and she’s already got her eyes set on a pair of Hollywood staples: David Hasselhoff and Jeff Goldblum.

The D-level Octomom’s developed a greater interest in showbusiness and acting during the weeks she spent in Hollywood training for her deflated Dancing With The Stars dreams. She’s now convinced that dating a notable male celebrity is just the boost she needs to achieve the brand of stardom she craves.

A Gosselin gossip spills to PopEater’s Naughty or Nice Column: “Kate is serious about going Hollywood and thinks dating a celebrity is a great idea. When Kate sees how Tom Cruise changed Katie Holmes life, it became clear that she needed to do the same. Obviously, she knows she’s not yet ready to date a George Clooney, but she thinks she would be the perfect partner for a Jeff Goldblum or someone like David Hasselhoff.”

Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones are heading back to the big screen for a third Men In Black movie, FOX News’ Showbiz 411 Column has learned.

The duo will reteam as Kay and Jay — roles they originated in the 1996 original — in a 3D sequel, we hear. MIB director Barry Sonnenfeld reportedly told Showbiz 411’s Roger Friedman that, despite rumors of Will’s departure, the actor has signed on to return. Sonnenfield hinted that MIB could roll into the cinema just in time Memorial Day weekend 2011.

The last Men In Black film hit theaters in 2002. To date the hit franchise has earned over $1 billion at the international box office.

Our beloved Dorothy Zbornak — a devoted animal rights activist — is making a posthumous appearance in the latest ad from the fur-hating zealots at People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.

PETA is bringng actress Bea Arthur back to life almost a year to the day of her death in a new campaign promo sticking it to McDonald’s.

A photograph of Bea appears next to this headline: “McCruelty. It’s enough to make Bea Arthur roll over in her grave.” The bold print in followed by a pro-animal monologue that begins with the words: “Death couldn’t stop this Golden Girl from fighting the Golden Arches’ cruel slaughter practices….”

The late sitcom legend “was a staunch supporter of PETA’s initiatives against so-called factory farming techniques and she will be the public face of an effort in that campaign to be aimed at McDonald’s. A photograph of Ms. Arthur is to appear in the ad next to this headline: ‘McCruelty. It’s enough to make Bea Arthur roll over in her grave,’” The New York Times said Thursday.

“When she was alive, Bea Arthur was one of PETA’s most stalwart supporters, and now—through a provocative campaign that PETA is launching thanks to a bequest in her will—Bea will remain an activist even in death,” a PETA spokesperson remarked in a presser this morning.

Arthur, best known as star of the hit TV comedies Maude and The Golden Girls, died of cancer last April 25.

D-Level reality starlet Kim Kardashian has gone Down Under, where she promoting a series of new projects for her fans in Australia.

Well, Kim’s trip got off to a bang this week after she was groped by former Big Brother Australia star Chrissie Swan on the set of her new Sydney-based talk show.

“A few people have asked if it’s real. You can grab it if you want,” Kim told Chrissie when questioned about her curvaceous bum.

Check out the clip to find out what Chrissie’s verdict was…

Jennifer Lopez is about to regret ever buying a camcorder with Ex-Husband from Hell Ojani Noa.

The Cuban chef has been sitting on a stash of “racy” video tapes and photographs starring his famous ex for more than a decade, and now that he’s filing for bankruptcy, Jenn’s valuable “assets” are going up for public auction!

Jennifer, who divorced Noa in 1999, is currently suing her ex in a bid to keep the footage and pictures under wraps, but now that he’s broke, she’ll have to take up her case to the Federal Bankruptcy Court.

Noa can “force the federal bankruptcy trustee to sell his share of the Jennifer Lopez ‘racy’ home videos, plus hundreds and hundreds of unseen and ‘racy’ candid still photos of J-Lo, and Ojani’s tell-all book manuscript about JLo at a public bankruptcy auction, to the highest bidder,” says a bankruptcy expert.

Ed Meyer, Noa’s business partner, told RadarOnline.com this week that Noa has “grown depressed over Jennifer Lopez’s poking fun at marriage (including their previous marriage)” to promote her new movie The Backup Plan, in theaters Friday, and just can’t wait to stick it to the movie star in court.

“Ojani feels he has suffered (and is still suffering) ’spousal abuse’ from JLo,” Meyer added.

There’s a shakeup headed for Seaside Heights, if a new report from The New York Post’s PageSix Column is to be believed. Although producers deny it, we hear MTV is looking to trim the fat on the upcoming third season its breakout reality smash Jersey Shore — and that could very well include ditching some of the fist-pumpin’ guidos and guidettes that make up the show’s cast.

While audience faves Snooki, Pauly D, and The Situation are all reportedly on board for a third installment of the docu-soap that shot them to reality infamy, the network is considering replacing the other Shore regulars — Ronnie Magro, Sammi Giancola, Jenni “J-Woww” Farley, and Vinny Guadagnino — with a crop of new and even more “outrageous” characters, the Big Apple tabloid reports.

No word on what will happen to former castoff Angelina Pivarnick, who recently returned to Jersey Shore after leaving three episodes into the first season

Has South Park gone too far this time?

Producers of the irreverant Comedy Central series South Park beeped out the words Prophet Muhammad and plastered its Wednesday episode with the word “CENSORED” after being issued a grim warning by a radical New York-based Muslim group this week.

In a description of last night’s episode, the network wrote: “South Park is in danger from angry celebrities, violent Ginger kids and Mecha Streisand in an all-new episode titled ‘201,’ premiering on Wednesday, April 21 at 10PM on Comedy Central. It’s a tense situation in South Park as Muhammad has become the pawn in the game to save the town. The Ginger kids are threatening to destroy the city if Stan and Kyle don’t hand over the Prophet and the celebrities have met violence with violence by unleashing Mecha Streisand.”

Revolutionmuslim.com criticized the show for including a satirical discussion on whether an image of the Prophet Mohammed could be shown, and a posting on the website now warns South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone that their flippancy could make them the targets of violent attacks.

“We have to warn Matt and Trey that what they are doing is stupid and they will probably end up like Theo Van Gogh for airing this show,” the message read, referring to a Dutch filmmaker who was murdered after making a film about violence against women in some Islamic societies. “This is not a threat, but a warning of the reality of what will likely happen to them.”

The website warning followed the first in a two-part episode of South Park (entitled “201″) a week ago in which Prophet Mohammad was depicted in a bear outfit. The statement posted the address of South Park creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker’s Los Angeles production studio, however a spokesman for the group denied the statement was a threat against the animators.

“Revolution Muslim only wants those offended to be able to voice their opposition by letters to the show’s creators,” a spokesman told CNN Wednesday.

Mornin’ PopCrunchers,

We hope you didn’t forget that today, Thursday, April 22, is the 40th anniversary of Earth Day. Please remember to be extra kind to our beautiful Planet as you go about your day. Feel free to visit USATODAY.com and EarthDay.org for a complete history on this annual day of environmental awareness and to find out way that you can get involved!

Madge says, “More Glee, please!”

Ryan Murphy, creator of the FOX musical hit Glee, is already in talks with The Queen of Pop to stage a sequel to “The Power of Madonna,” the show’s 60-minute tribute to the music of The Material Girl, which aired to rave reviews on Tuesday night.

Glee’s Madonna special, which featured the critically-acclaimed cast performing some of the superstar’s biggest songs, was also a big hit among TV viewers – 13.5 million people tuned in to see the episode.

And that’s precisely why Ryan’s hoping to pack even more of Madonna’s hits into a proposed upcoming sequel.

“Madonna and her people are into it and want it to happen,” he revealed to Entertainment Weekly on Wednesday.

In a moment so perfect it could possibly cause the planets to align, super-cute Taiwanese chubster Lin Yu Chun teamed up with William Shatner to sing Bonnie Tyler’s ’80s hit “Total Eclipse Of The Heart” on TBS’ Lopez Tonight Wednesday!

Asia’s answer to Susan Boyle, Lin gained international stardom as a web viral sensation for his uncanny performance of Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” on a Taiwanese singing competition earlier this month. In his first appearance on American late night TV, Lin performs his rendition of Whitney’s charttopping ballad of forbidden love, “Saving All My Love For You.”

How did he do?

The Secret Service has joined the investigation into the curbside robbery of actor-turned-politician Kal Penn in Washington this week.

Penn, real name Kalpen Modi, was mugged on a street in the Nation’s Capital early Monday after a gun-wielding man fled with his wallet and personal belongings. According to police sources, Penn was walking on S. Street in Northwest around 1:20 AM when he was approached by armed suspects.

Sources say they forced him to the ground, took his money, his wallet, and his government identification.

TMZ.com spies tattle that the thief also took off with Penn’s two cell phones, one of which was issued by the US government. The Harold & Kumar actor left Hollywood in 2009 to join President Obama’s team as the Associate Director in the White House Office of Public Engagement. Since one of the stolen phones belongs to the government, the Secret Service has joined Washington’s Metropolitan Police Department in the investigation of the robbery.

White House Communications reportedly stopped service on the stolen phone immediately after Penn informed them of the robbery.

No arrests have been made.

Did Snooki attend The Joe Jonas School of Celebrity Breakups?

Stealing a signature move from the middle JoBro — who famously dumped Taylor Swift over the phone in 2008 — Jersey Shore’s Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi used a profane voicemail to call it quits with her muscular Facebook buddy-turned-BF Emilio Masella.

Snooks — who is in Miami filming seasons for the forthcoming second season of The Shore — dumped the Gold’s Gym trainer after she suspected him of cheating and using her for fame — these fears were magnified after Emilio tried out for the upcoming season of MTV’s The Real World. Emilio — who cried a river over the split in an exclusive with PEOPLE on Wednesday — argues that he’d never be unfaithful to his poufy-haired girlfriend and charges that Snooki ditched him so that she’ll have a free pass to lock lips and exchange bodily fluids with her Jersey Shore castmate — and chiseled friend with benefits —
Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino.

A newly-single Emilio tells PEOPLE: “I told Nicole I tried out for Real World and she was upset. She thought I was using her to get on the show which is ridiculous. I’d never cheat on her–I love her. I talked to her yesterday and I was like, ‘You know I’d never cheat on you; I’d never do something so low.’ She said she hadn’t hooked up with anybody [either] — but she freakin’ lied to me. She put out there that I cheated, which is ridiculous, and now the tables have turned. It sucks. I never asked her for anything. She’s the one that pulled me into the spotlight, bringing me to all these places. It seems like she’s starting to get jealous. I talked to her yesterday afternoon and I fought with her. I [told her] she has no reason to be mad — and she hung up on me. I told her, ‘You can’t expect me to stay home and never go out if you’re gone for two months.’ But I’m not a scumbag. She said, ‘If you want to have fun, bye,’ and she hung up. She’s being very jealous and spiteful. I don’t know if she [broke up with me] on purpose so she could hook up with Mike. I knew [her time on set] was going to be crazy, but I didn’t think it was going to be this crazy. I trusted her and I trusted all the kids in the house too — I was friends with them too. I thought they’d have more respect for me than that. I’m not going to let a girl step all over me and cheat on me.”

Christina Aguilera will make her musical comeback on the live ninth season finale of American Idol next month.

The multiplatinum-selling, Grammy Award-winning recording artist will stop by the final Idol of the season to perform her dance-fused new single, “Not Myself Tonight,” producers of the FOX series said Wednesday.

The singer is hitting the comeback trail hard to promote her forthcoming album Bionic, premiering in June.
Xtina’s also lined up to appear on The TODAY Show and Oprah as she promotes the new effort.

Aguilera will make her motion picture debut alongside Cher in the movie musical Burlesque later this year.

–True Blood’s Alexander Skarsgard was snapped by Inez van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin for a spread featured in “The Scandinavian Issue” of VMAN Summer 2010….

-Facebook now has more than 400 million users — and shows no signs of slowing down…..

–Life & Style Weekly claims Kate Gosselin hasn’t had a good roll in the hay since Jan. 2009. I’m still not sure why we needed to know this information, but it sure explains a lot!

-Drake’s create his own Economic Stimulus Package for a group of his closet childhood friends.…

-Kim Kardashian escaped an abusive marriage!

-Seth Rogen tops Forbes’ 2010 list of Hollywood’s Hardest-Working Actors….

-Rihanna’s trip to a Swiss hospital has been explained: The star was treated for an injured rib….

-It’s getting Real Dirty Down South. In the biggest batch of messness to hit The Real Housewives of Atlanta since Sheree coined the phrase “Who’s Gon’ Check Me, Boo!,” NeNe Leakes and Kim Zolciak are accused of going upside the head of resident gay Dwight Eubanks. He should have been smacked up for the jacked up nose job ages ago…..

-Here are “15 Movies Posters Re-Imagined with the Stars Originally Cast….”

-CNN’s countsdown the 10 Top-Paying Jobs for Women……

-Very sad: American adoptive parents prefer girls over boys, and non-black children over African-Americans, according to a new study carried out by a group of economists……

–Britain’s Got Talent judge Amanda Holden will reportedly fill in for Early Show co-host Maggie Rodriguez — who goes on maternity leave next month….

Now here’s an odd matchup made in musical heaven!! Internet singing sensation Lin Yu Chun — dubbed “The Taiwanese Susan Boyle” for his rousing performance of Dolly Parton/Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” on a Asian talent show earlier this month — has performed a duet with Star Trek icon William Shatner that you’ll have to see to believe.

To check out William and Lin’s full side-splitting performance of Bonnie Tyler’s ’80s ballad “Total Eclipse of the Heart,” by sure to tune in Lopez Tonight this evening, Wednesday, April 21, @ 11 PM on TBS!

Chun, 23, earned millions of views on YouTube for his eerie performance on Taiwan’s Super Star Avenue — only to be ousted just a week later. Shatner, on the other hand, has released several albums over the years, beginning with 1968’s The Transformed Man, which featured of cover of The Beatles classic “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.”

Whitney Port is a regular Ann Landers! From tackling “puffy eyes” to selecting a jaw-dropping dress for your first date with a new beau — Go ahead, ask her anything! The MTV reality star-designer-PR ace, who appeared on The Hills before moving to New York City to work for acclaimed designer Diane von Furstenberg in the spinoff smash The City, is penning an advice manual set to hit the shelves of your favorite bookseller in 2011.

The Whitney Eve designer plans to unveil a tome of “personal stories, and advice for young women.”

True Whit, which will be released by It Books next fall, is described as: “conversational, fun, and candid guide for girls looking to start out [in life] with style.”

Port, now 25, thinks sharing her experiences as a young adult will be beneficial to other young adults. She tells PEOPLE: “Being a twenty-something can be a difficult phase. There are so many questions, and I wanted to write about my experiences for anyone who needs help navigating through life.”

True Whit may be in for some true competition when it debuts next year. Former Saved By The Bell star Elizabeth Berkely is also working on a book of advice and guidance for young women. Whitney’s not the only Hills alum to take on the literary world. Port’s pal Lauren Conrad — who appeared on the MTV series for five seasons before bidding farewell last year — has written two New York Times Bestselling novels.

The new season of The City is scheduled to premiere on MTV April 27.

Kelly Clarkson is responding to the public outcry over her upcoming Indonesia concert sponsored by Asian cigarette brand L.A. Lights. Kelly will be performing the world’s fourth most populous nation on April 29, and some anti-smoking proponents believe the former American Idol’s affiliate with the tobacco firm is encouraging a hazardous system that allows tobacco companies virtual free rein to peddle their products to Indonesians, via movies to sports sponsorships. and television shows.

Clarkson’s controversy comes two years after Alicia Keys objected to a similar tobacco-fuelled sponsorship deal in Indonesia. A. Keys demanded that the cigarette logos be removed from all ads promoting her Jakarta concert, and US-based anti-smoking groups want Kelly to do the same.

In a message to fans posted on her blog Wednesday, Kelly voiced her displeasure with the cigarette company’s sponsorship of her show, but added that she was unknown of the arrangement. Kelly says the situation is now out or her hands.

“So ….my morning began with finding out that I am all over billboards, tv ads, and other media formats along side a tobacco company who unbeknownst to me is sponsoring my Jakarta date on my current tour. I was not made aware of this and am in no way an advocate or an ambassador for youth smoking. I’m not even a smoker, nor have I ever been. Unfortunately, my only option at this point was to cancel the show in order to stop the sponsorship,” she wrote.

“However, I can’t justify penalizing my fans for someone else’s oversight. This is a lose-lose situation for me and I am not happy about it but the damage has been done and I refuse to cancel on my fans. I think the hardest part of situations like this is getting personally attacked for something I was completely unaware of and being used as some kind of political pawn.”

Indonesisa remains one of the last holdouts that has not signed the World Health Organization’s tobacco treaty.

Heather Locklear — the sexy star of primetime soaps like Dallas and Melrose Place — is facing a real-life legal drama: She was arrested in her suburban Los Angeles home for hit & run on Saturday.

Law enforcement sources tell PEOPLE that a resident of the North Ranch Country Club in Westlake Village, California heard a crash near Heather’s home at approximately 4 AM on Saturday morning.

The incident was not reported until 7:48 PM on Saturday. When deputies arrived on the scene several hours later, they found a knocked-over parking sign. After further investigation they confirmed that Heather’s 2005 black BMW had jumped the curb and struck the sign, but the actress never called the accident in to police. She was promptly arrested for hit-and-run.

According to the Ventura County Sheriff’s department, Locklear’s vehicle matched debris from the knocked-over sign. No further details were disclosed.

Locklear was cited on a misdemeanor charge of “Leaving the Scene of an Accident.” The collar is the second driving offense for the beauty in the past two years. In 2008, Heather was arrested in Santa Barbara for allegedly driving under the influence of prescription meds. She pled not guilty and was placed on informal probation for three years.

Police do not suspect that Heather was under the influence at the time of her most recent accident.

No word on how this latest arrest will affect Locklear’s probation, but we can expect to see her in court next month.